Where have they gone?

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Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 478
   Posted 11/10/2009 11:14 AM (GMT -7)   

As I approach my first anniversary with our forum I thought it a good time to post this.

I spent this past summer In N.H. finishing our dream retirement home and really lost touch with the forum. In August a wonderful e-mail came to me by a dear friend I have found right here at Healing Well. She said how she missed me, little old me, and my replies to many posts. I tell you I was so happy and thought WOW! someone has actually missed me.

This leads me to my point. Have any of you thought about where many of us go that we have spent so many of our daily experiences with? Now, of course, we come here to find comfort, friendship, and knowledge to cope with this terrible syndrome, Fibromyalgia. And I suppose as we "grow" many of the topics seem redundant as the newer people join. Don't misunderstand, I think it is awesome the way new members come on BUT where have the others gone? Also we can always rely on our moderators that give so very much to us.

Personally I miss many. To name just a few; Pattiipanda, now there was an awe inspiring wonderful girl. Then we had Sleepy Bug who never failed to use our names and understand us. On to Danibm and on and on.

My post is do you have old friends you miss as I do? Also how can we ensure the "older" people hang in there?

Warmest hugs, Patsie

Veteran Member

Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 844
   Posted 11/10/2009 12:46 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Patsie.  Yes I wonder where some people go.  The one that sticks in my mind is Kelly 71.  The last I remember she took a job babysitting her nieces for the summer and the kids were giving her a hard time.  I felt bad for her.  I hope the fact that we don't hear from her and others is that they are doing well and are getting on with their busy lives.
Fibromyalgia, arthritis in spine and hips, IBS, Raynaud's syndrome, hypertension
On the eighth day God created Golden Retrievers.

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17524
   Posted 11/10/2009 1:57 PM (GMT -7)   
Patsie, we have many that come and go and then come back again.  Hopefully they are having a good period with their fibro and being able to do more things.  I think most will be back again.  Keep an eye out for them.
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 478
   Posted 11/10/2009 2:46 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks for responding Sherrine. You know how we count on you!!!! Yes, I will watch and hopefully they will return.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9090
   Posted 11/11/2009 12:28 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Patsie!

I can really understand your sentiment! It's hard when you have made special friends and they fad away. I have made tons of really great friends and I am sad when any of them just disappear, but as much as we want them here, there is something in there life that has taken them elsewhere. Like others said, they may be doing better and have moved on...who knows.

One think to think about is why any of us came here to begin with. We need and want help, security, compassion or maybe we are terrified. Some of the forums in HealingWell are about diseases that do shorten lives. Luckily fibromyalgia isn't a threat to our longevity. But when any of us come we are hurting in one way or another. Where were all of us before that time? Maybe the pain wasn't quite bad enough yet? Possibly our lives were empty and we felt lost? Or did we come to get the facts?

Once our needs are met, then what? If you got the information you needed then you go. If you find out you aren't the only person on the planet with these symptoms then you feel more secure and might not stick around. In general, people don't come to forums like this when life it good. I think it's human nature at work here.

But for some reason there are a small percentage of those who stick around. The friendships and a desire to help is often what does it. For me I love to help others. Also when I'm helping others I tend to forget about my own misery. I stay because I can't imagine leaving! wink I'm someone who goes into things for the long haul. And this is one of the reasons us 'old timers' work hard to make this such a warm and family like environment. It helps people relax, be more calm and realize that there are people who do care about them. I believe of all of the forums on HealingWell, the fibro forum has the largest stable population of any. That's a tribute to each and every one of us who come whether it's for a day, a year or for the duration.

Now don't YOU go leaving us again young lady..OK?...lol
The three grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for. — Alexander Chalmers

(\o/)Co-Moderator Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
Fibromyalgia, PTSD, UC, Diabetic on insulin, collapsed disk, arthritis scattered around and a few other delights.

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 478
   Posted 11/11/2009 4:07 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Chutzie,

I think I will now just believe everyone is doing much better and as you say have moved on. I am just a curious Georgette and wonder where people go and how they are. You share so much here and that is a very special thing especially since we hold cyber hands.

Thanks for answering. Maybe my post should have asked how many of us have developed "outside" relationships thanks to Healing Well.

Hugs, Patsie
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