Monday Koffee Klatch

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Date Joined Jan 2005
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   Posted 11/29/2009 10:28 PM (GMT -7)   
I see everyone was in great hands while I was gone. Looks like I best leave more often! We did relax and had a few days of quiet, except for the roar of the surf just over the dunes and the rain pounding on the roof. I love that sound when I'm out camping in the trailer. Ahhh, that's true Washington weather.

I'm posting this a bit early for Monday but I'm falling asleep and need to get this posted before I face plant on the puter. Key marks on my face aren't very sashionable.

Today I was thinking about traditions we have had at the holidays and was discussing with hubby on the drive home. What would happen if I changed a couple of them? I am considering, seriously, changing a couple of traditions that will save a good chunk of money. I did talk it over with hubby and he has no preferences except his ears perked up when I told him about how much we would save. This year I think most everyone is spending less, changing buying habits or just doing without the extras.

Could you change a holiday Tradition? Is it worth the extra expense? What IS the one tradition you are thinking about right now?

The three grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for. — Alexander Chalmers

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Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 599
   Posted 11/29/2009 11:06 PM (GMT -7)   
My two sisters and I have changed having Thanksgiving dinner together and instead spend it with others. It happened due to illness a few years ago and it's just so much fun now. We don't feel "forced" to spend Thanksgiving together because we usually see each other at Christmas, either Christmas Eve or Day. So instead we can visit friends, spend with our significant others, volunteer, even travel (which is what I like to do, but didn't this year). At first it felt weird but now we are in the habit, and it's very relaxing.

Just wait til I tell them next Christmas I'm going snorkeling some place warm for the holidays. And then I'm going to do it every year!! :)

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Date Joined Apr 2009
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   Posted 11/30/2009 5:32 AM (GMT -7)   
I don't really have any traditions that cost money. My traditions mostly include movies.
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. Dr. Seuss

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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9090
   Posted 11/30/2009 10:02 AM (GMT -7) have a lifetime ahead of you to build traditions. I guess what I was thinking when I wrote the topic for today is that even though our emotions are set in tradition, we can change them and the world won't end. This is the first time ever I didn't spend Thanksgiving with my family/kids and the next morning the sun came up...well, above the rain clouds it did and life went on. It was hard and fun both and I'm not sure what next year will bring. But in the mean time, we all are capable of making new traditions, enjoying them or changing them any time we'd like.

The three grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for. — Alexander Chalmers

(\o/)Co-Moderator Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
Fibromyalgia, PTSD, UC, Diabetic on insulin, collapsed disk, arthritis scattered around and a few other delights.

Irish Babe
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Date Joined May 2007
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   Posted 11/30/2009 12:22 PM (GMT -7)   

Growing up we always had our 'in house' family together on Christmas Eve, w/ other members joining us on Christmas Day. After we got married, we went to my parents for the Eve dinner and later that night to MIL. When my father passed away the tradition shifted to my house on the Eve, my in-laws Christmas morning at our house and at my sister and BIL's for Christmas dinner. My in-laws were invited to our Eve dinner but said they wanted to spend it w/ 'family'. My DH was very hurt, all those yrs he thought he was 'family'. We used to do all the holidays here, I have had to stop all but Christmas Eve. It is very tiring, but I will continue to do it as  long as I can. I have spent every Eve w/ my mother since I've been on this earth, and I don't want to miss any that we may have together.

I used to decorate like the electric co depended on me to exist. I decorate very simply now. Small table tree, a few special ornaments, mostly from my childhood or from my children, the Nativity I had as a child, a village scene, angels and Santas given to me thru the yrs. I can't afford a lot of gifts, so two per 'child', but something special they want.

I used to cook and bake till I would fall over exhausted. I now make 3 Lasagnas, one for dinner, one for my sister to take home and one for my family for dinner the next couple of nights. My DD makes a salad, some garlic bread. I make a couple of pks of ready to bake cookies, instead of the from scratch cookies I would make. I bought some pumpkin pies from this great bakery and some cheesecakes. I put cd's on of the Christmas music we have enjoyed thru the yrs. My cousin comes over on the Eve and joins in our fun. My DH makes a pot of coffe especially for my mother. She likes his coffee, I don't DO coffee. Our children are w/ us, my sister, my niece and nephews come over. It is very toned down, but the best part is we are all together. That to me IS the most important tradition, one I don't want to see end. We make a toast to those who share our meal and those who have passed on.

My son is planning to move after the New Year, I told him next yr we can do Thanksgiving at his house, he looked panic stricken, then said 'OK, but we'll have pizza'. I said 'OK, extra cheese!' I'm flexible. yeah Things change in your life and w/ that traditions change. It isn't bad, it is life.

God bless.  Alice.

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Date Joined Apr 2005
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   Posted 11/30/2009 12:38 PM (GMT -7)   
Boy, Alice and I are on the same wavelength!  I used to bake 14 different types of Christmas cookies, make holiday trays and pass them out as gifts to neighbors and, of course my husband and kids had their fill.  Now?  I don't bake a thing. 
I used to make peanut brittle, chocolate covered English toffee, fudge, chocolate Rudolph suckers, chocolate bark, haystacks, chocolate covered cherries, etc.  Now?  I don't make candy.
I used to decorate the house to the hilt.  I now have my tree up and a few favorite decorations.  I have some wreaths under the lights on each side of my garage door, and a manger scene in my home.  That's it.
And, while I was preparing Thanksgiving dinner, I had my neice and cousin come to me and say they didn't want to exchange gifts...just buy for the kids.  I was very happy about that, too!  I think many are having problems financially plus most of us have way too much stuff to begin with.  So, Christmas is getting easier and will allow me to really focus on WHY we have this wonderful holiday to begin with.  Now, THAT is what I call a blessing!
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Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 478
   Posted 11/30/2009 12:51 PM (GMT -7)   
Sherrine, add me to your wavelength.

Chutzie, I think it is good to change a few traditions now and then. Funny this subject led me to one I was having Thanksgiving. We all do a grateful thing around the table and when it came my turn I kinda paused. Then I went forward and had to say that Fibro has totally changed my life BUT not all bad. I am now very aware of little things in life. It made me think how many of us may find some "good" in this place we are at. I cannot do and keep things like I want to but is that such a bad thing. I now use my energies very selfishly and think they are much more worthwhile!!!

I have already changed the big Christmas Eve gathering I had recently started in NH. To be there for Christmas is my wish and that will have to do. If no one else picks it up so be it. It is what it is.


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Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 11/30/2009 1:08 PM (GMT -7)   
I have made major changes in Christmas over the years with fibro, I did a traditional Thanksgiving again this year don't know about next year. No one will mistake me for Martha Stewart these days. We have Christmas for our children and grandchildren only on the Sat before or after Christmas which ever everyone can make, this year it will be on the 19th. They will all be here most of the weekend which is fine I enjoy that. I will make some snacks and have deli stuff for lunch and after Santa, aka Grandpa, comes we will order our traditional pizza. I stopped buying for our children and their spouses when the grandkids out numbered them and now we draw names for the adults. I am having a problem with deciding at what age I should stop buying for the grandkids, I have one turning 22 on the 4th and now that oldest granddaughter is a mommy and I have a baby to buy for this year I don't know if I should buy for her and her boyfriend or not, it won't be the same not having her sit on Santa's lap to get her gift if I don't. I have some new movies for them to watch Sat night. Grandpa gets up on Sun. morning and makes a big breakfast for everyone and they will all go home some time Sun.
We do have one problem this year, youngest granddaughter's birthday is the 14th and we have to have a party for her some time that weekend. Yeah, she gets a double load of gifts.
luv and hugs
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Irish Babe
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Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 1380
   Posted 11/30/2009 2:26 PM (GMT -7)   

I had a friend growing up whose b/d was 12/26. He never had a party for his b/d, just blend it in to Christmas. My brother's younger boy (geezer!) is the wk before Christmas, my younger son (geezer) is 2 wks after Christmas. Growing up they each had their special day recognized. We do parties like that on the Sunday before or after b/d, depending where b/d falls in the wk and who can get there. Now we just do a quiet in house b/d. Each b/d is a speical gift and should be acknowledged. IMHO.

My older nieces and nephews 30+ don't get presents anymore. I still have a bunch of younger ones that receive small gifts. I have many great n's/n's, I just couldn't keep going on like that.

Marlee, how about if gd holds her son, while sitting on 'Santa's' lap and he gets gift from 'Santa'. That would be a cute picture. She might like it, too. Just a thought.

God bless.  Alice.


Nana Monster
Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 957
   Posted 11/30/2009 3:25 PM (GMT -7)   
The only modification I'm making this X-mas is working a double instead of a single shift. A lot of people
don't want to work on holidays but it doesn't matter to me. Since I've gotten divorced (in 86) my family
stopped getting together with me. Guess I've saved alot of money as I don't have to buy any of them
gifts anymore.....their loss.
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