At the end of my rope

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New Member

Date Joined Nov 2009
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 12/27/2009 2:37 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi. I was diagnosed a year ago and up until now have been living a pretty normal life. I am a mother of three all of whom are at ages where they can help themselves and help around the house. My husband is fairly understanding and picks up my slack if I just can't go on acting normal.

Christmas has just pushed me over the edge. I hurt EVERYWHERE and I wish I could sleep right through my life. I have gained so much weight - I feel horrible about the way I look.

Tomorrow is Monday and I can't see myself going to work - the thought of taking a shower and lifting my arms to wash my hair is something I just can't tolerate.

I'm not even sure why I have picked today to post. I don't have any questions...any advice...or anything positive to say. I guess I just want you to know that I am here.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9090
   Posted 12/27/2009 3:35 PM (GMT -7)   

Welcome to our Fibro Family! And maybe the reason you posted today was just as your title are truly at the end of your rope, and can't even see how to tie a knot and hang on. I think all of us have been there at one time or another but somehow survived it. That does NOT mean it's easy though.

I've had an especially hard Christmas this year also but my fibro, like all others, acts a bit different than yours. I've been struggling with it for about 8-9 years through flare ups, holidays, sadness, happy times....all that life has to offer. This all amounts to stress and that is our worst enemy. I would imagine the holidays kept you very busy and just a 'bit' Like most moms we just keep going but you and I and the others here just can't do that any more.

Now, don't take that to mean you can't have a wonderful life...K? But it does mean we will have to regulate and pay more attention to when and how much we do. If you've not read "The Spoon Theory" (it's in the Fibro 101 thread at the top of page one listings) now is a good time to do so. I really does explain how limited our energy is and how we have to be very aware of how we spend it each day.

So today...pamper yourself! No extra chores, or better yet, none at all if you can swing it. Let others do the cooking and you are to rest! Have a long, hot bubble bath and get those muscles warm. Don't fret over tomorrow. It will come no matter how we worry about it. If in the morning you can't move, then make two phone to work and one to your doc. See if one or both might be able to have some compassion and help your.

Are you on any treatment from a doctor? Or use OTC medications? Maybe it's time to review with your doc and see what suggestions he has for times when the pain is worse. I am very lucky to have a great doc who believes in quality of life along with his medical practice. If you haven't been to see him in a while and/or the pain is worse then going in for a check-up is a good idea anyway.

But for me, most of all, finding the wonderful people here is the best medicine invented for fibro. Everyone understands and truly cares about each other. This is a place where we can help others and by doing so it returns to us more than we ever give.

Never be afraid to ask, share or comment on anything here. It's why we come. We are a family and you now are part of it. Here, take my hand <extending hand> and I'll walk with you and hopefully show you how good life can be in spite of fibro.

Warm hugs,
The three grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for. — Alexander Chalmers

(\o/)Co-Moderator Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
Fibromyalgia, PTSD, UC, Diabetic on insulin, collapsed disk, arthritis scattered around and a few other delights.

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/27/2009 4:16 PM (GMT -7)   
You can grasp on to my hand as well..very aptly put Chutz ty...u hv come to a great place with the best pple to help you out imho i do hope you will stay around and yes also try to read ..spoon theory...lyn
                                Co Mod for Crohns, Anxiety/Panic, Alzheimers
   Crohns..Pyoderma gangrenosum,..Anxiety / panic..Fibromyalgia,,Neuropathy...Deaf...Seizures
                        I DONT COMPLAIN...OTHERS ARE WORSE OFF THAN I AM                                   
                             No BETTER GIFT than FRIENDS N FAMILY                                               
                            Happy Holidays from my home to yours

New Member

Date Joined Nov 2009
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 12/27/2009 6:50 PM (GMT -7)   
Thank you so much for responding. I was feeling so alone. I am currently on cymbalta and amitriptylin. I'm having such severe pain the last few days - I don't know what to do to help myself. I'm not comfortable laying, sitting or standing. The weight of my own body hurts me. I'm sure you all know what I am talking about. I've just not ever had it this bad before.

My husband is a "fixer" and is driving me crazy. There is nothing that will fix me as quickly as he wants it to happen. He wants me to go to the doctor right now - but I know seeing an ER doc will only complicate things. And actually sitting in this computer chair is not as painful as it was earlier today. Maybe I am feeling a bit better...

Let's hope...

Regular Member

Date Joined Nov 2009
Total Posts : 104
   Posted 12/27/2009 11:06 PM (GMT -7)   
I know exactly what you mean when you say your husband is a "fixer". Mine is the same way and it drives me crazy! When I say I hurt, he says take your meds. Like it's that easy! Once I tell him it's not time to take them again, he throws his hands up and says well, there's nothing you can do so stop complaining! It's hard to make it through this "invisible" illness with unsupportive people around you. I am lucky enough to have a very good friend going through this with me. I was just diagnosed in Nov of this year, and she was diagnosed over 10 years ago. When I have a bad day, I talk to her, not my husband. It helps me make it through the day. If you need that "supportive friend", come here and post. Or email me if you want! I'm new to this, but I am a great listener! Please don't allow yourself to feel alone when there are so many people here who understand you and care about your pain. If you have a question or just need to vent and let off some steam, we are here to listen and offer our support!

Keep us posted on how you are doing! Don't be a stranger, and maybe that shower in the morning will come a little easier than you thought it would...
Fibromyalgia Dx November 20, 2009

Pain issues: Pain in neck and upper/lower back, chest/ribcage pain, Degenerative joint disease in both knees, migraine headaches, very painful menstrual cramping, pelvic pain.

Meds: Neurontin 300mg.

First PM appt on February 5th!

Tammy <3

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 599
   Posted 12/28/2009 4:03 AM (GMT -7)   
I am feeling the exact same way as you, TIWC - I had a pretty low stress holiday weekend, but I am STILL so tired and sore I can hardly move. Lifting up my arms or legs is agony right now, and I just want to sleep. Some of it is depression, which taking Cymbalta helps, but some of it is just from the really hard flare pain that has been happening for the past 3 weeks with me. So, hang in there and I will too. Our fibro family is here to help us get through the day, and we are there for them as well. Welcome!

New Member

Date Joined Nov 2009
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 12/28/2009 11:58 AM (GMT -7)   

 What a difference a day can make!  It must have been all the warm wishes I received from this site!  My pain is not gone, but it is at a level that I can stand!


(sorry if I am not supposed to use my real name)

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17526
   Posted 12/28/2009 12:08 PM (GMT -7)   
HI, Michele, and welcome!  I missed this thread but see that others jumped in.  They usually do.  We have wonderful members that love to help one another and, as a bonus, we really do care about each other, too!  I think you will like it here.
I'm so glad that you are feeling much better today.  That's what fibro does and you need to remember that!  When you are feeling really lousy, just will get better.  We have our bad days and our good days.  That's why I look forward to each new day with anticipation because I don't know how I'll be.  I expect it to be a good day and I always plan reasonable goals for each new day.  Even if I'm having a crummy day, just reaching my goals makes me smile and I do feel a little better!
Be sure to check out the Fibro 101 thread...the second thread on the forum.  There are links to good info about fibro and you will learn a lot there.  The more you know about this illness the better equipt you will be to challenge it and do what you want in your life. 
I'm so glad you found us and joined our family.  I hope to hear more from you soon.
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 12/28/2009 1:52 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Michele and welcome to our family. It's okay to use your first name, many of us do. Your so right, an hour can make a world of difference some days. I don't stress when I start hurting cause I know from experience it may only last a short time if I don't stress over it.
Is there a mother out there that believes in Christmas that isn't stressed this time of year??? I am so relieved today that it is all over with I started a thread about it. I was beginning to think today would never get here. smilewinkgrin My family is my life but enough is enough.
I'm glad your so much better today.
We are always here for you.
luv and hugs
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium, Osteoarthritis and Celiac
Amitriptyline, Celexa, Xanax, Synthroid, Zyrtec, Micardis, Spironalactone, Tylenol, Reglan, Lidoderm Patches, Carafate and Prilosec
Vit D/calcium

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 846
   Posted 12/28/2009 2:05 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Michelle, adn welcome!! I'm so glad that you decided to join us. Everyone needs to unload sometimes, especially to others who understand and won't judge. We've all been through times when it just seems like we can't go on anymore. I am so glad that you are feeling better now. Keep posting, all the good and the bad :) I'm looking forward to gettign to know you better!
fibromyalgia and possible trigeminal neuralgia
50 mgs amitriptyline daily, T3s for facial pain (really not appropriate med) and now tramacet

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 4796
   Posted 12/28/2009 5:21 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Michelle, This is the perfect place to get hugs from others who understand, we're all
here for you and I'm glad you are part of our family! Also glad you are feeling better.

Hugs, Robin
MCTD, Fibromyalgia, Raynauds, Osteoarthritis, Osteoporosis, Degenerative 
 Disc Disease, Hypertension, Migraines and Pseudothrombocytopenia MEDS: Methotrexate, Savella,Flexeril,Diltiazem, Boniva, Vitamins 

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