I hope you can find use in our ideas and suggestions...they are given with love!
I agree...you do NOT owe them an explanation, but I think most of us would want to explain and keep trying. It's just who many of us are...we're the givers, the ones who take care of everyone else and often we are taken advantage of and at times even with our own permission.
But it's time for you to take care of YOU! As for the friends well, I guess I'm a bit unconventional but here's what I would do. I would put it in writing. Three pages, like a little book for each of the ones who keep being disrespectful to you.
Page 1) I'd make a copy of an explanation of fibromyalgia. Here's a link to the National Institute of Health you can use. This is a good start. www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/000427.htm
Page 2) This is called the Spoon Theory. If you haven't read it then it will get the point across as to what your days are like. Here's where you can find it. www.butyoudontlooksick.com/navigation/BYDLS-TheSpoonTheory.pdf
Page 3) The final page is just one word....'YES'. Yes, you would love to "fill in the blank"
today but I'm afraid I can't. My spoons are all gone. YES, I'm always in pain but I try to hide it from view. YES, I just can't seem to say NO and feel like I'm not being heard. And YES, I love you but if you can't love me back WITH my fibro then I'm sorry to lose your company.
If the words won't/can't come out your mouth then a real letter, not at email, will do amazing things. Also, invite each and every one of the to a doctor's appointment with you and have the doc explain what's going on.
I do hope you can slow down. It took me a very long time to learn the NO word and some times I still don't use it enough but I'm doing better when I respect myself! We respect and love you...you can do it to.
Warm hugs and loves,
"Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, but Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad."
(> <) Co-Moderator Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
Fibromyalgia, PTSD, UC, Diabetic on insulin, collapsed disk, arthritis scattered around and a few other delights.