Guilt and Fibromyalgia

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New Member

Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 1/20/2010 10:53 AM (GMT -7)   


I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia a while back. I'm not 100% confident in that diagnosis, but I want to share my experience because it might help others.

At the time, I was working 9-5 at a computer for the first time in my life. I was also rowing, and often didn't stretch as much as I should have. But I think what triggered my fibromyalgia was my leisure time, during which I spent long hours on the web at home. The reason this became so detrimental is that I felt very guilty about it afterwards. And when I was feeling guilty, I started paying too much attention to my body, always checking it for pain, afraid I was hurting myself, wasting my energy. I'm pretty sure when a healthy person asks themselves how their body feels, very often they will find some pain. The problem, in my case, was that I let that pain grow in my head, and I let it tell me that I had to rest more, take more medication, and that I wasn't up for exercise. Once you start accepting that you will feel a little pain after exercise, work, and other activities, you can start creating positive associations with the pain in your head. People who work out feel less pain, but also enjoy the pain they do feel, because it's an accomplishment for them. Once I stopped paying so much attention to my pain, this condition of increasing pain, fibromyalgia or not, went away.

I know some people will find this post stupid or misleading. This is just my story. I think it could have been similar if instead of guilt, my pain trigerred anxiety, depression or self-pity. This is my opinion, and I put it here because I truly believe it might help others.

Wishing well.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 439
   Posted 1/20/2010 12:13 PM (GMT -7)   
I firmly believe my pain was triggered by emotional abuse by my co-workers. I think that a lot of us will agree with you ... hours and hours seated in front of a computer does cause as much pain as running a marathon could. I don't think you need to feel guilty. I encourage you to limit your internet time and take walks between your internet sessions.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 439
   Posted 1/20/2010 12:17 PM (GMT -7)   
P.S. I also went through a series of times when I would get a little better then WAY worse before I got an official diagnosis.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 1771
   Posted 1/20/2010 12:41 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi, and welcome. This is a great site for support and information. Here is a link to an overview of current research being done on fibromyalgia:

Hugs - Austen
"There is no charm equal to tenderness of  heart." - Jane Austen

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 1/20/2010 12:49 PM (GMT -7)   
Hopefully, I appreciate you sharing your story with us but I also doubt your dx. There are so many other symptoms with fibro besides the pain, you can find them listed in the fibro 101 thread, second on the page. If exercise and wishing fibro away worked there wouldn't be many on this forum, myself included. Some have had this all their lives, long before they could feel guilty about anything. Does guilt, stress, anxiety play a part in fibro, it sure does. When we stress it causes our muscles to tighten up and hurt worse and stress zaps my energy quicker than anything else. Exercise is very important to fibromites to keep the muscles stretched but we can also do more damage than good if we over do it. There is a happy medium for everything when it comes to fibro.
I totally believe in positive thinking. One of our mods is the most positive person I know but it hasn't cured fibro. I do things everyday that are hard and it would be easier to give into the fibro and not do them but I'm not giving in to this DD. I have to do things differently and it takes more time and planning but I do them and I will continue doing as much as I can and if all this magically goes away someday great but I'm not holding my breath.
luv and hugs
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium, Osteoarthritis and Celiac
Amitriptyline, Celexa, Xanax, Synthroid, Zyrtec, Micardis, Spironalactone, Tylenol, Reglan, Lidoderm Patches, Carafate and Prilosec
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Myself 09
Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 6089
   Posted 1/20/2010 2:06 PM (GMT -7)   
Whatever works for you. Each person is different, so I am glad you have found an answer to your ailment.

Salve, M
Fibromyalgia DX 2005. Ulcerative Colitis, arthritis, TMJ. Family History of Fibro--2 out of 3 siblings diagnosed.

There are three kinds of people in the world: ones who see the glass as half-full, ones who see the glass as half-empty, and others who see a big crack in the side which is leaking all over their %$#@# foot.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 2858
   Posted 1/20/2010 2:19 PM (GMT -7)   

I had a point in time when I was certain the two dx's for fibro, one from a rheumy and another from a neurologist, were wrong.  I wasn't plagued daily with obvious pain, although I had other symptoms...tingling sensations, periodic weakness in my limbs, fatigue, dry mouth...a myriad of symptoms that I never associated with fibro because I was told  with fibro I would be in chronic, unrelenting, pain.  Then the pain returned and has not gone away since.  All I am saying is this disease is unpredictable.  I climbed five miles up a mountain this summer, and kept thinking, "I'll pay for this big time."  I did not.  Yet three weeks later, while shopping in Walmart I had to sit in the patio furniture section and call the hubby to come and get me as sudden, unexpected pain raced through me without warning. I agree that a sedintary life style is not good for a fibromite and of course a positive attitude is a must.  But I don't think 'talking' ones self out of it works.  The kind of pain we get can not be 'ignored', but we can distract ourselves with other things so it lingers in the background.  That just MHO.  And stress...a big time trigger, especially for me.


fibro, menieres disease, RLS, anxiety disorder, disc compression, scoliosis, spinal stenosis TMJ  Meds: valium Advil

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 4796
   Posted 1/20/2010 6:15 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi, welcome to the forum! Who really knows what causes of fibro? The cause is unknown.
Many of us can attribute a tramatic event, overwhelming stress, an illness while others
could say, it came out of nowhere.

We all share some of the same symptoms, the pain, fatigue and fibro fog, but we are all
individuals and I don't think no two of our illnesses are the same. We all lead differant lifes,
take differant meds and have differant stressors.

Fibro diagnosis is difficult because of the shared symptoms with other disorders. Blood tests
need to rule out connective tissue disease, and a tender point exam should be given.
The American College of Rheumatology says a person should have a history of widespread
pain for at least three months. There are 18 designated tender points that should be checked.

There is no ryhme or reason why pain is overwhelming one day and the next day doing
the same activity the level of pain isn't as high. With fibro nothing is consistent, the pain
is always lingering but you never kwno how bad you will feel from day to day. It always keeps
you guessing, but I know the pain isn't all in my head!

Time will tell whether your diagnosis is a correct one. I hope that you don't have it!


MCTD, Fibromyalgia, Raynauds, Osteoarthritis, Osteoporosis, Degenerative 
 Disc Disease, Hypertension, Migraines and Pseudothrombocytopenia MEDS: Methotrexate, Savella,Flexeril,Diltiazem, Boniva, Vitamins 

Post Edited (crazykitty) : 1/20/2010 7:13:56 PM (GMT-7)

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 236
   Posted 1/20/2010 8:48 PM (GMT -7)   
thanks for your story . I am so pleased that you have been able to ease your pain.yeah smilewinkgrin 
 I agree with you that your DX for Fibro could not  have been correct.. Lord knows I wish it was just a mater of positive thinking. I think we all do..
I have always been a very positive person. and about 12 yrs ago. was in the best shape of my life.. there is nothing like the feel of burning muscle when you first start working out. I loved it. and yes its a matter of accomplishment . every muscle in my body was tone , I even had a six pack tummy . lOL..
after living through 4 1/2 years of physical , emotional, mental abuse, being manipulated. being beat up , hit ,chocked , and having this man try to break my neck . .. Yes. I heard something give a crack noise and Begged him to stop. ... I fought back... and to this day will never allow anyone to hurt me in this way again. I lived though it and became a better person. I worked my way out.. built my own landscaping business. and did handy man work ( yes I am women ) but I did it..
I did not let this get me down mind you and went into the Horticulture business .. was doing great . and these dang adhesions inside me went rampage.... I am  tough( so I told myself LOL )  so worked through it when I probly should have given myself a break.. I would work. until I could no longer walk due to the sever pain every step caused me. even the slightest bump in the car would almost make me pas out with pain. but ya I kept going . had major surgery to clean them all out . and
then decided . per Doc instructions no more heavy lifting for he rest of my life to be a florist.. this would be cake   so I thought .
after two  incisional hernia's
one from lifting a $260.00 vase arrangement I made , and the 2nd .. believe it or not. from doing crunches trying to get back in shape. .. yep what I thought where burning musical.. was my gut ripping open again..
finally I had a Doc that told me I was killing myself with the line of work I was doing . broke my heart to give it up . but had no choice.
I believe that this is what triggered my Fibro .. a combination of abuse by another person . and me thinking I could just push through everything. my thought process was a little different back then until I finally found the right Doc. that if I have to live with this condition . at that time mainly the adhesions. I was not going to let it stop me or slow me down. Wrong wrong wrong. I now listen to my body . and try to be good to myself. I for a while had guilt about,asking for help to lift something and  not being able to get all the things done I wanted to . like my house being as clean as I used to keep it. and such. but have since learned . I do my best and listen to my body . I stop before I hurt myself most the time and this gets better as we go.
Lord I wish it was just about paying to much attention  to the pains we feel.or Guilt...  
I now work of my computer. so ya.
anyway sorry this is sooo long. but I had to get this out .
I pray and wish you only the best in life.and pray you stay pain fee. turn  
I know if we dwell on things it can make things worse. yes that is true. ... and we must stay postive. also we must keep moving forward. always.
Big hugs my  dear and thanks for sharing . it's always good to share .
I think you will like this group of people. yeah  

Spirit ~
Fibro, Chronic Fatigue ,Anxiety ,( arthritis,, hands, feet, knees, back , neck )  , disk disease in neck with bulging disk , adhesions , Migraines, High blood pressure ,Gerd, IBS , Sever sleep apnea
Med's ,,,  fentanyl patch, Perc, Soma, anxiety meds, Ect.

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