How do you cope?

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it's a new day
Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 8/12/2010 6:36 PM (GMT -7)   
How do you cope with the extreme sadness that comes with the start of a flare?

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 387
   Posted 8/12/2010 6:45 PM (GMT -7)   
Varies from day to day.  Some days I am OK and others I have rough days.  Hope that you feel better.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 4796
   Posted 8/12/2010 7:29 PM (GMT -7)   
It sounds cliche...but it works for me...taking one day at a time.

I'm somewhat used to pain, I've lived with it for a long time. Finding ways to distract
myself from the pain is routine. When I'm flaring I try to keep my mind occupied so
I'm not dwelling on how bad I feel. I had to find new activities to replace the ones
I can no longer do. Keeping myself active as I can is important.

My hubby is at work during the day, so I make it a point to see my friends during the
week. If I'm flaring I can't do all day shopping trips but I can do lunch. Making time
for exercise, flare or not helps too. If I got paid for everytime I wrote about deep
breathing and meditation, I'd be rich....relaxation therapy helps me.

Writing is an outlet for my emotions so I write poetry often and it helps keep my mind
off pain. There are days that I will feel overwhelmed and feel like I'm riding on an
emotional rollercoaster, but they pass just as flares do. Somedays I do have a good
cry and it does feel good to get it all out. I'd rather laugh though and try to find the
humor in things.

I still love life... I know I can still be happy but believing I could was my first step
towards acceptance of chronic illness.

Hoping that your flare is short lived and you feel better soon. Sending gentle hugs!

hugs, Robin
Fibromyalgia, MCTD (Lupus, Scleroderma & RA) Raynaud's, Osteoporosis,
Osteoarthritis, Degenerative Disc Disease, Migraines, and Hypertension
Prescription Meds: Savella, Cyclobenzaprine, Methotrexate, Diltiazem, Boniva,
Folic Acid.  OTC Meds: Multi-vitamin. Vit, D, Vitamin B12 & calciim supplements

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17524
   Posted 8/12/2010 7:54 PM (GMT -7)   

I keep busy.  Genealogy is my outlet...that and reading.  These are something I can do while in a flare.  I also spend time here on the forum.  During a flare, I do baby myself some but I also keep moving so I don't get worse.  Try those stretching exercises in Fibro 101.  They really do help and aren't hard on you when you are so sore.


[color=blue>Forum Moderator /Fibromyalgia
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7

Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 377
   Posted 8/13/2010 12:52 PM (GMT -7)   
Everyone says distraction. My hubby bought me some oil pastels and the art paper. I also have chalk pastels. So, since I can't use my fingers so much I can still smear the oil and chalk gently. I'm trying all sorts of Hobby Lobby kid kits out too. I read and take baths. I do "take it one day at a time".

Sometimes I feel crazy...and this last week's been hard. My friend's husband committed suicide last Friday. Every time I feel well, on the edge, I think of my friend. She's 28, been married two years, and now she's a widow with a mortgage. There's never a life that another person isn't touching. I think of what's she's facing and it helps me cope. I couldn't hurt her again so soon, I couldn't hurt my husband in such a way either. Anything...anything at (when I can...coming here when I'm scared of myself and trying to help someone else who feels as scared and alone and "on the edge" helps me so much sometimes. Even if they hate what I say, at least I know that someone out there undesrstands what "I'm" living with. Whatever works...and coming here is sometimes the best therapy in my world.

Good luck, feel better, and stay strong.
Allergies and Asthma my whole life: Benadryl
Depression and PTSD after surgeries and illness of 2003 (turned out to be Crohns)
Crohns Dx'd: February 2008: Pentasa, Hyoscyamine
Fibromyalgia Dx'd: July 21, 2009: Lyrica, Cymbalta, Hydrocodone, Prenatal Vitamin

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 41907
   Posted 8/13/2010 1:51 PM (GMT -7)   
I am with these guys, distraction and taking your life one day at a time.  Meditation and relaxation techniques.  You have to take back control of your life, and I feel that is done by just going with the flow of things sometimes.  It gets your emotions in check.  Trust in God that he isn't going to give you more than you can handle.
I do hope that you feel better soon.  And as was posted above, sometimes a good cry is what we need. 
Hugs, Karen, hang in there!!!
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 5951
   Posted 8/13/2010 7:34 PM (GMT -7)   
And love yourself. Cut yourself some slack - you deserve it!
...fibromyalgia, hearing loss, elevated liver enzymes, skin grafting (back), arthritis, scoliosis, lumbar disc damage, sciatica, IBS, migraines, tachycardia, cancer surgeries (face).......I take Nortriptyline & Clonopin daily, and Darvocet as needed

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2010
Total Posts : 554
   Posted 8/14/2010 9:43 PM (GMT -7)   
All of the above. Excellent posts, everyone.

It helps me to keep telling myself, "this won't last forever." And then, 10 minutes later when I forget what I just told myself and slip into thinking, "oh, this is terrible!", I shake myself gently (again) and say, "No, this won't last forever. In a couple days I'll be into some sort of mischief, feeling more like me again." I repeat this process over and over all the time.
Why my username? It is real life nickname. I love chickens. Will have my flock of hens one day! :D .............. DX'd with Fibromyalgia, chronic hives, sensitivities and allergies, migraines with auras, tmj, and IBS. Not sure what else!
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