And I'm so happy you found this wonderful fibro family! I'm sure you'll find what I did when I first came...I found a large and welcoming group of people who not only are there for emotionally but are still there when I'm feeling better. That's my definition of a true friend.
One thing to keep in mind, and I'm not saying this to depress you, but you are going to have some amount of pain the rest of your life, probably. The goal is to have a doctor who's sharp enough that he/she can get your pain reduced as much has possible and still have you alert
and functioning. But the only way to eliminate every bit of pain, at this point, is to be totally unconscious and none of us want that...unless it's the middle of the night and we're sleeping.
One thing I would suggest for your family, not just your husband, is to find someone who's impartial to talk to. If you have a church you go to they should have a counselor who will listen You can also ask your doctor for a referral to a pain psychiatrist and/or marriage counselor. I'm not saying your marriage is on the rocks, just a few pieces of gravel here and there maybe.
Also pain counselors are very aware of what we are living with and can give you tons of helpful ideas. Many forum members have used pain counselors and felt it was time well spent. Having one person in a marriage who has health issues is vary hard on the marriage itself, let alone other family members who you interact with daily...like your children. Do this as a favor to yourself. I'm sure you'll find positive results and happier days ahead. When the two of you are feeling much better about
things then he will find it easier to act in a more even way toward the children. It's easy for a dad to gravitate toward the oldest child. At this age they are often easier to have as a 'little buddy', to play with or do projects with. The younger ones are still learning the ropes
I've offered a lot of ideas and please remember that's all they are, my ideas. I will say an extra prayer for you and your family tonight that your family find more peaceful times and that your pain lessens with good management.
Moderator on the Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain forums
Daily Donnybrook: Fibromyalgia, Insulin Dependent Diabetes. Ulcerative Colitis, Rare form of Dermatitis, Collapsed Disk, Osteoarthritis (especially in right hand and neck) and a couple of other adjunct agitations.
"Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love." Albert Einstein