I can relate! My M-I-L can be just wonderful. Other times, it's quite another story. I deleted my previous post, because I probably got the thread a bit off track. In short, I think if our relatives respect us, they will let us know well in advance if they plan on coming over, and ASK if that's okay.
Probably we all struggle with keeping the house clean. We already 'juggle' too many things, having this condition. I just do the best I can. I can't seem to keep up with the dusting, but if the floors look pretty good, I think it helps everything look better. I'm also working on getting rid of clutter and too many extras.
But if our houses were spotless, I think it would show us to be pretty shallow--maybe even boring. I like my hobby materials handy, and I don't want to take a lot of time putting things away when I'll need them again soon. What works for us, as long as it doesn't cause problems for others, is what matters, if we're in charge of keeping the house clean.
I know too many people with spotless houses who have no other life. No thanks!