"The Kübler-Ross model describes, in five discrete stages, a process by which people allegedly deal with grief and tragedy, especially when diagnosed with a terminal illness. The model was introduced by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her 1969 book "On Death and Dying". The stages are known as the "Five Stages of Grief".
The stages are:
- Example - "I feel fine."; "This can't be happening."'Not to me!"
- Example - "Why me? It's not fair!" "NO! NO! How can you accept this!"
- Example - "Just let me live to see my children graduate."; "I'll do anything, can't you stretch it out? A few more years."
- Example - "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?"; "I'm going to die . . . What's the point?"
- Example - "It's going to be OK."; "I can't fight it, I may as well prepare for it."
Kübler-Ross originally applied these stages to any form of catastrophic personal loss (job, income, freedom). This also includes the death of a loved one, drug addiction, divorce, or infertility. Kübler-Ross also claimed these steps do not necessarily come in the order noted above, nor are all steps experienced by all patients, though she stated a person will always experience at least two."
I went through all these stages when I was first diagnosed with hep C; however, I went through them quickly, in a matter of weeks, thanks to being able to share in AA meetings. When I was diagnosed with liver cancer, on the other hand, I didn't experience all the stages. For whatever reason (perhaps it was a form of denial), I just did not feel that it was my time to die. Acceptance of the diagnosis came fairly quickly, and after a week or two of thinking I MIGHT die, I set about seeing what could be done to prevent it. And just in case I couldn't prevent death, I also did practical things like setting up a joint cremation acct. at the bank, so my b.f. (now ex, but still on the acct.) could have access to the money to take care of expenses if I should die. For me, getting into action makes me feel less helpless and a little more in control of my fate.
So, Michelle, hopefully going back to work will help you feel more "normal" and be helpful in lifting you out of that black hole of despair.
Prayers and hugs,