Laura, if you read my above post, you know I have some familiarity with alcoholics. I have been a sober one for nearly 23 yrs., thanks to AA. I was also married to 2 practicing alcoholics. Every alcoholic has to reach his own "bottom" before he will accept help. Rescuing him is the worst thing you can do. In doing so, you are silently condoning his drinking. Let him get lost, pass out in a motel, get arrested for DUI (has that happened yet?) and all the other things that go along with being a drunk. An alcoholic usually has to lose everything (job, home, family, health) before acknowleging he has a problem. Then he has to become willing to do something about it.
I've been where you are, wondering if your hubby is out there passed out in the street or wondering if he has been in an accident, or how he's going to behave when he gets home. You never have any peace because you are always in a state of worry and turmoil. The best thing you could do for all concerned is to take the girls and go somewhere for awhile. Do you have family who could take you in? It would be hard to get him out of the house unless he becomes abusive and you tell the cops that you are afraid of him.
Your girls are very young and you may think they don't know what is going on or understand it. But I can tell you that they do feel the stress in the house and hear you when you're fighting. It makes them insecure. Somewhere deep inside, they know their dad isn't like other dads. Of course, their awareness will increase with age.
I know you are wondering what to do for or about your husband. However, I'm more concerned about you and your children. I implore you to go to Al-Anon. Find Alcoholics Anonymous in the phone book and ask for the nearest Al-Anon meeting. There are also online meetings, if you are unable to get a babysitter or take the kids with you.
If your husband is ever somewhat sober, that is the time to try to get him to see a doctor. It's also the time to "tell it like it is;" that he will die soon if he doesn't stop drinking and get help both for alcoholism and his liver. Let him know what you've read. Don't do this in a confrontational way, but in a very calm, caring manner. You may get nowhere, but it's worth a try. You probably already know that it's useless to discuss anything when someone is drunk.
Please keep coming back here for support and information. And if you want to talk things over at any time, feel free to e-mail me (click on my name for my profile and it's in there.)
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"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland