Hello Ranji, and welcome to the forum.
What a sad story you have shared, of the last months of your Mother's life.
I can see that you are in the stage of wondering what you might have done differently that would have changed the outcome.
If you take some time and read back through our posts, you will discover that liver disease is individual for each patient...when their time comes, whether they can come back after a major set back. You will see that some overcome the odds and have a successful transplant even though they have kidney problems. Some do not.
But the stages of your mother's illness are quite the same as others...it is the speed at which they cause the body to fail that varies.
Many have ascites or fluid by the lungs. Some have life threatening bleeding from varices in the esophagus that she did not have.
The treatements your mother had are the standard protocols and medications.
Since your mother received excellent care at the transplant hospital and just didn't get strong enough before her transplant time came, maybe over the next months you can think what a wonderful gift you gave her taking her to visit to her family in India. To move away from family is very difficult and returning "home" to visit is very important in your culture. She had the opportunity to enjoy her family and friends and they had the opportunity to say goodbye in a proper way...face to face.
It is a wonder she was well enough for the trip and it is a miracle that she was so alert
during her last days. For that you are lucky. We have members here who report their loved ones can't recognize them or are very confused and aggresive. Or in a coma like state.
My partner had a liver transpant a year ago at 62. So far he is doing well. After his surgery, the doctors told Mike that if a donor had not been found, he was in his last days. Before he went under the anesthesia he told his nurse that he was prepared to die or live...no matter which way, but he knew he could not continue as he was....so sick for so long.
Even now, after surgery, he has Hep C. That has not changed, becaese it is a blood disease that damages the liver...not a liver disease that goes away when the damaged liver is removed. He had a tumor and that is gone, but the body, once it makes a tumor, can often make another because of the Hep C. So we know that Mike is not free of problems....he just has more time for living. We don't know how much. None of us knows OUR time.
I am sorry that your mother did not get strong enough for the transplant. But it would be good if you stopped beating yourself up. Do you know that if you took her to hospital in India that they may not have been able to help her? There is different kind of donor program there. Most liver transplants are from living donors who give one liver lobe to a sick patient. I don't know if these procedures are safe, but the Internet discusses this type of program which is different from the cadaver donor model generally used here.
I think your long descript
ion of the stages of her decline are important for our members to read. It describes in great detail what can happen, and often does happen. The spouses and children of our patients often ask what they can expect...and this is very clearly what they can expect.
My heart goes out to you. I hope, over time, you can begin to focus on the wonderful years you had with your Mom and how she helped you become the strong woman you are today.
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
Partner received liver transplant May 1, 2011, Jackson Memorial, Miami, FL
Post Edited (MamaLama) : 6/9/2012 3:03:07 PM (GMT-6)