Timing is everything!! It has been 23 days since my brother, LJ, died. Feels like yesturday. The Hospice Grief classes do not begin until May. Man, I could sure use them now. I have had so many Blessings for my nephew, great family and friends to talk to but this past weekend get away proved to be a set back.
I don't want sympathy but I sure could use some understanding as to my feelings getting irrational especially when other's haven't a clue. All in all, a dangerous situation 4 wheeling turned out without any injuries except mine. Being hurt for feeling left to fend alone in a bad situation that family had invited us to do.
Lesson learned. Changes are in the making. Time is moving quickly mostly. I have lost 15 pounds. Not unhealthy, much needed and I am not complaining. I take my vitamins, and eat healthy. It is a good start to a new beginning.
I have yet to deal with the agony in my heart. I feel when my mind and my heart are on track, then I trust timing will be there again and someone will be there just when they are suppose to be. I keep watching, listening, and being Thankful all I can for Blessings.
I think about that Sunday. Not just having to assist but watching LJ take his last breath. Oh the tears roll but I wipe them away and find a distraction. Much reading, educating and a different life to lead. Alot to adjust to, heal from and move forward.
Thank You for this thread. I hope it may continue. We are all still apart of this horrible ordeal. Blessings to you all!!
Love and Many Prayers,
Your present circumstances don't determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start.