Aw jt80, I firmly believe you are not there yet.
You had one sentence that jumped out at me - "I'm supposed to be eating for my IBS." Very important word in that sentence - FOR!
IMHO, mind you I am not an expert but had to face some harsh realities as you have had to, I think that once you let go of the past - eating whatever you wanted, having normal bowel activity - and face the present and future, doing whatever you can to make it more normal, will you see lasting improvements.
I'm not saying I do not have weak moments - oh I have them. And I indulge but usually in very small amounts. The other night our vegetarian daughter came home after an 8 week summer internship and she offered to make dinner. We hardly ever eat out (budget reasons) so I took her up on this kind gesture. She made us grilled portabella mushroom burgers. After eating 1/3 of my burger I stopped. I just knew I shouldn't eat the entire sandwich. My husband finished my burger, saying - ah, okay, you like the mushroom burger, it just doesn't like you? I laughed and said - something like that!
I know that eating is a vicious cycle. Bland foods probably really bum some people out. I am grateful I like them. Because they are my life! LOL But boy if I had once enjoyed very spicy food, etc. I'd be hurting right now. Missing out, like you are.
And who knows, if you do cut out the foods that mess you up, maybe someday and possibly soon (a year or two), you could enjoy them again, in moderation. It might not be forever that you have to give up these foods. But for now, I really think that if you pay close attention to what your GI tract needs to feel well, in the long run your bouts with D might be fewer.
Wishing you my very best, as always.
- Rectal Cancer 4/29/99, Stage I, no treatment necessary
(5 hour colon resection: 90% sigmoid removed, 15 inches of colon removed, gall bladder removed, temporary colostomy, reversed 8 weeks later)
- Chronic IBS/D symptoms, multiple bm's, on low residue diet
- Takes Colace 50 mg each evening