IBS leading to tension with friends........anyone else?

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Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2010
Total Posts : 47
   Posted 9/12/2010 10:09 AM (GMT -7)   
When I first starting having IBS symptoms My best friend and his girlfreind (also a good friend), claimed my IBS was in my head or that it was simply my diet.  Of course their words hurt extremely bad, but Have resolved those issues. During that time I was bitter towards anyone that questioned my health and had family members such as my dad, cousins, or uncles question my suffering. They have even gone as far as to say my IBS was just an excuse to be lazy.  Last week I had a friend of 6 years go off on me and tell me I was worthless, fat, and about 20 other profanity-laced insults that I will spare potential minors from reading.  Anyone else have these problems, and if so how do you handle this.  It has been over a month since I have been able to work as I have had severe nuasea everyday along with the runs or constipation.  I already feel worthless and seem to have people in my life not understand my level of suffering. Just looking to vent i guess, but man does this really suck!! mad

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 1956
   Posted 9/12/2010 7:15 PM (GMT -7)   
Welcome to the forum! You've found the right place to vent. Yes I've had issues with trying to explain all of this too. We all have I suspect. In my case, I initially felt compelled to fully explain my situation. Over time I realized the more details I gave, the more confused people got and they then felt compelled to give me advice (as if I hadn't sought any on my own). So now I give them as little details as possible, if they press me for info, I simply state - I have IBS, I need to eat a specific way (plain food, small portions), and need to use a bathroom frequently. But I did not arrive at this acceptance place easily. Or quickly. It took me a while.

But yes it does suck. What I find difficult is trying to exist and interact with friends/family with normal colons. We walk a fine line sometimes, they can eat anything and never have trouble. Whereas we need to eat a certain way possibly and then deal with the consequences.

I honestly don't know what the answer is for this dilemma but it is individualistic, some of us like talking about it, some clam up. Me? I can go either way, just don't put me under a microscope and ask me tons of questions, that's almost too much focus.

I just wish there were bathrooms all over the place - one of my pet peeves are restaurants with one stall. ONE! Or I wish there were rest stops like you find on interstates, in communities. I also hate it when businesses have signs posted - no public bathrooms.

I find it so comforting walking into a public bathroom and seeing a dozen or more stalls. You'd think I won the lotto or something. It's as if my insides just relax.

I'm getting off track. Just smile, deal with your IBS and try not apologize for it. You sometimes have little control over it and only want acceptance you're doing all you can to feel better.

I'd never wish this disease upon anyone.....wait, I've always said there is one person - Bin Laden. But he's the only one.....lol

Hang in there...hopefully you'll get more replies.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 1539
   Posted 9/12/2010 8:06 PM (GMT -7)   
have you officially been dx with IBS? If not see a gastro Dr......

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2010
Total Posts : 47
   Posted 9/14/2010 8:49 AM (GMT -7)   
yes officially diagnosed, but I think it is wrong. Severe nausea everyday for over a month now and pain at least the size of a baseball non-stop for over a year. I think IBS is making me crazy. I can wake up early in the morning and can't get back to sleep becuase of nausea. I liiterally have NO life, all i did yesterday was watch season 1 of Lost. How pathetic right? But what else do you do when you can't go 10 feet without feeling like you are going to barf.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 1956
   Posted 9/14/2010 11:25 AM (GMT -7)   
Well, given the fact that I was a diehard, rabid fan of Lost, I don't think that was so pathetic. lol

It did take your mind off things I'm sure.

But you should have more energy than that though. I have very little when I have either the bowel dumping or diarrhea. I've never suffered from the nausea or vomiting from this. And landed in the IBS situation after a colon resection.

Keep track of your symptoms and then call your doctor again. There has to be something they can do to relieve the nausea.
- Rectal CA 4/29/99, Stage I, 90% sigmoid/15" of colon/GB removed, temporary colostomy, reversed 6-26-99
- Chronic IBS/D symptoms, multiple bm's, on low residue diet
- Colace 50 mg, twice daily + Probiotic: Renew Life/Ultimate Flora/Critical Care/80 Billion daily

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2004
Total Posts : 1293
   Posted 9/14/2010 12:30 PM (GMT -7)   
You should ask your doctor about functional dyspesia as well, sometimes people have both and that maybe part of the problem with the nausea.

I don't call it IBS really to my friends anymopre I tell them I have a brain gut axis disorder, sounds more official.

This is excellent for those you really care about.

Explaining Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) and treatment to partner, family and friends is not always easy. This insightful recording (on CD or MP3) is provided for IBS patients who wish to share information with their families or colleagues about living with Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Also a useful recording for physicians / gastroenterologists to give to their patients and their families.

IBS Companion: Irritable Bowel Syndrome - Information for friends and relatives
In addition to enduring your IBS symptoms
No doubt you are also dealing with family members, friends, co-workers and others who don’t quite know what to make of your condition.


Its the only one of its kind and excellent recording for those who don''t understand your IBS and what its like to live with it.

You not making IBS up, its not in your head and some people try and help and it doesn't help, others can help and some its not worth explaining to at all. This is tough and not uncommon at all, in fact its another aspect of having IBS that can be tough to deal with, since IBS is not a visable disorder, other then how it effects a person. Unless someone has it it can be very hard for others to understand what it can do to someone.
IBS Forum Moderator

I am not a doctor. All information I present is for educational purposes only and should not be subsituted for the advise of a qualified health care provider.

Please make sure you have your symptoms diagnosed by a medical practitioner or a doctor.
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