Ok so today is probably the worst day I've had so far.
I've been waking up twice a night still, but last nght there wa less urgency than there has been before so I was grateful I had a few more seconds to wake up before I had to get up. But the pain has been unbearable. If I didn't konw better I saw I was starting with labour (not that I know what that is like!)
It started last night just before I got in bed. The cramps were so strong it reduced me to tears because I was so fed up and I couldnt make it stop. I went straight to bed to lie down, and woke up a couple of times in the night. This morning I had a few sips of water and the cramping started again. My husband had to go to work, so I was in the bathroom a few more times after he went. I managd to get back in bed and fall asleep for a couple of hours, but when I woke up (quite late, about 12.50pm) I felt awful, and to be honest I felt a bit confused. I got up and had a shower, but I felt like I didn't know what I was going to do next. I feel drained, exhausted, and thought of doing anything at all makes me feel dizzy.
I'm supposed to be making a nice roast dinner for my husband for when he gets home from work and the thought of it terrifies me. I realise this must sound totally ridiculous, and when I think about it I realise it is, but I can't help it. I wish I could just go to sleep and not wake up until I knew I was going to feel better.
I have been starving hungry all morning, and the only thing I've been able to eat is a little pot of Blackcurrant Jelly and half a glass of water. I look in the fridge at all the delicious things I could eat and I could cry because I know if I eat them I will just be in agony for the rest of the day. I'm sorry to sound so emotional, but this has been the worst day ever for me and I never knew it could have so much of an effect on me.