I figure why not go to those who know. I've been monitoring the site for a while now and thought I'd sign up and take the plunge.
I guess I should preface this by saying I am doing better now than I have in the past 20 years.
However, now that I've said that, like a prisoner of war I have much emotional damage to deal with.
When I was in my 2nd year of college, my life literally changed overnight. I woke up one day with the worst stomach cramps and spent half the day in and out of the bathroom, This never stopped, from that day on it became so persistent that I ended up out of school, living at home and pushing myself through what felt like life and death anxiety and fears through the next almost 20 years. Extremes of extreme my life shrank and shrank, very hard to socialize, work, travel, almost anything.
I'm in L.A. now finally feeling as close to pre condition I ever have. I've kind of missed my adult formative years. I'm about
to turn 40 soon, never really dated, never had a long term relationship, and really hard to admit (thank God this is anonymous) never been intimate with a woman. The shame and embarrassment as a guy from not being able to support myself, not in control of my body, such dislike for myself.
I want this to end. I figure women with IBS can understand and maybe there's someone out there in Los Angeles who needs to be supported and can support.
I hope no one is offended by my writing this, but this is life and I don't care anymore. I have to do what I can to help me.