What you should do is get yourself listed at a good hospital for a kidney transplant. Act quickly - it's a long process and dialysis is incredibly difficult, so try to minimize any time you may have to be on dialysis for. Some of the best transplant centers are UCLA in California, New York Presbyterian, and University of Maryland Medical Center. UPMC in Pittsburgh is also good. Talk to one of these - whichever is closest - and work on the process now. Now, I have seen many people with a fistula in their arm. It's not pretty, and I think it may mess up your arm forever. When it is time, you may just want to go with a chest catheter while you work on your transplant. It's a little more trouble, but it will completely heal after it can be removed.
Talk to a center, and your family, about all of your issues and pains. The only thing that will bring you relief is addressing the problem.