Carol nailed it. I couldn't agree more. His love sounds conditional, and that isn't what a loving, compassionate marriage is all about. When I got married, I had lupus for 2 years. I was in a remission, so my hubby didn't really know how bad things could get. Now he knows. I've been having issue upon issue for a couple of years now. He tells me all the time that he wouldn't even dream of being with anyone else. He never makes me feel like a burden and he says he's with me to the end!!
Like Carol said, if it was him who had the disability, would you leave him? No, of course not. Gee, I could quote every single sentence that Carol wrote, LOL. He needs a wakeup call, big time.
You also need to be kinder to yourself. Don't blame yourself for this disease Jenny. It's life. Life goes through changes all the time. We have to find ways to accommodate our new lifestyle and ways to cope with the changes. You both need to find ways to cope, manage and embrace the changes. Encourage your hubby to go and do the things he wants to do. Don't let lupus hold either of you back from making plans and having goals.
I can do anything through Jesus Christ who strengthens me. I have learned in whatever state I am in,to be content. Phillipians 4:11-13
34 years old. Diagnosed with lupus in 2000. Fibromyalgia, anti-phospholipid syndrome(APS)(stroke),Sjogren's, Raynaud's, seizure disorder-(miraclulously disappeared!), Libman Sach's Endocarditis, vasculitis, sacroiliitis, arthritis (neck) . Prednisone, Imuran, Coumadin, Clobazam, Amitriptyline, didrocal, Cozaar, calcium, Cykolokapron, multi-vitamin, vitamin D, Magnesium, vitamin B6, Acidophilus