everyone, THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for all this input.
It's actually made me feel less alone with this mess.
I too had the whole ego thing going where I was sick and worked. One morning I fainted in traffic (was able to stop the car in time) and instead of turning around and going home, I went to work. That's the day I knew I had to call my Rheum and admit I needed time off.
Melissa, my rheum told me the same thing, that I needed to stop the stress. But it's like a double edge sword in that work is stress and being isolated at home is stress. but of course, not having to battle traffic, getting dressed up, making lunch every day and not having to get up at 5 am really lowered my stress.
Lynn, you said "I, too, was afraid I wouldn't get LTD -- and just as afraid that I *would* get it"
THAT hits home big time. This is exactly how I feel.
Lucy, loved what you said about
using energy. I'm such a spiritual person, you would think I would figure this out much easier.
Hester, for some reason. I was ok to work sick. I can work with the worst joint pain and fatigue, it was the vertigo (dizziness), anxiety and flu like feelings that cropped up only about
2 yrs ago that kicked my butt.
When I first got sick 15 yrs ago, in my mind I was lazy, overweight and didn't eat well, so thought changing that would help and it did! REALLY, I felt well. I was not dx with any illness then. Though I did go see dr's they didn't know why I was sick.
It's almost like when I got the dx of lupus then lyme, I gave my bad days more power.
I also noticed more and more symptoms which I think were triggered by major stress.
DQueen, I always wanted to live in a small town. I am sick of this large city. And by the way, I'm craving ice cream because of your nick name..haha
Again all, thanks so much. really, I feel so much better
Also, the insurance dr called. They will see me next week (they first told me end of Jan). I wonder if this dr will really side with me or my insurance co.
The dr is also VERY far from me. Ugh!
The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong in the broken places