Please don't ever feel that you have to apologize for telling us how you're doing. You're not whining either! Hehe.. This is your reality. These are valid, truthful feelings, and there isn't a single one of us who hasn't felt exactly the way you are right now. I think the first year of this diagnosis is the hardest. Everything is still very new, doctors are new and some of them are just plain stupid and ignorant. Your lifestyle has changed, and you don't feel or look the way you did before all the meds.
You're going through a very natural grieving process. Depression is one of the stages, and it's so very important and healthy to go through these phases. If you were dealing well with "it", that would be a worry..... You're not supposed to deal with "it" well. You're psychologically healthy and this is what needs to happen. Give yourself a hug, and don't be hard on yourself. Be good to you.
It's also okay to know if you need an anti depressant. They do help. I'm on Zoloft, and it's evened me out a lot. Looking after our mental health is as important as looking after our physical health.
We're here for you. We can be your family. I hope as time goes by, and you can post more often and get to know us, you'll realize you're not alone at all. You have a whole forum of family members with Lupus!
If you don't like your doctors, fire them. Move on. Most of us have gone through 3 or more rheumies before finding one that fits. They are integral in network of support. You have to be very proactive with Lupus. Be your own advocate. We can give you tips on how to make a doctor's visit as worthwhile and productive as possible.
Have a restful night, and we'll talk soon!
I can do anything through Jesus Christ who strengthens me. I have learned in whatever state I am in,to be content. Phillipians 4:11-13
34 years old. Diagnosed with Lupus in 2000. Fibromyalgia, Anti-phospholipid syndrome(APS)(stroke, 2002), Sjogren's, Raynaud's, Libman Sach's Endocarditis, vasculitis, sacroiliitis, arthritis (neck), anxiety. Prednisone, Imuran, Coumadin, Clobazam, Amitriptyline, Didrocal, Cozaar, Zoloft, Neurontin, calcium, multi-vitamin, vitamin D, Magnesium, vitamin B6, Acidophilus
Moderator for the Lupus and Fibromyalgia forums