Hi Asherah! Welcome to the forum. There are lots of people here who will be able to address your questions. www.lupus.org is also a good place to go for information on Lupus.
I can only tell you that your story sounds almost identical to mine. I had been diagnosed with fibromyalgia by 3 different docs - but nothing else was showing up (thyroid, autoimmune markers) for nearly 10 years, five of which I knew things were changing and getting worse, but didn't know what to do about it without definitive lab findings. I never could tolerate any of the fibro meds. In 2007 a high +ANA started to shed some light and I was started on Plaquenil in 2009. I also have a very high CRP, but nothing else has shown up lab-wise. I am on my 3rd rheumatologist - and he thinks RA is part of the puzzle, too - even though my knee xrays showed only mild to moderate changes. I might have gone nuts over the "no definitive answer" thing for such a long time, if it hadn't been for this forum.
I have every single symptom you listed with the addition of hair loss. Thyroid tested a jillion times. I do have celiac, which was identified last year and am on a gluten free diet. My grandmother had rheumatoid. My daughter also has Celiac. It is not uncommon to have both Fibro and Lupus,or RA or other autoimmune disorders.
I'm sorry you are going through this same process - but it is good to know you are not alone, right? I hope you are seeing a rheumatologist and getting appropriate testing through him/her. Lupus is known as the disease of 1000 faces - someone who specializes in auto-immune problems and particularly lupus, is who you need.
Good luck - and hang in there - I know so well how miserable you are feeling. Plaquenil has helped - but it took awhile. I'm sure others will be along to add their thoughts. Rest and stay out of the sun (it took me forever to realize the sun was triggering flares) and use sunblock.
All the best -