Oh Cathy, you've been having such a tough time. I'm so sorry to hear that. I had written a long reply but my #%@* computer lost it. So I'll make this shorter. I hope you're seeing a psychiatrist. I've seen the same one for 7 years for depression & anxiety. Trouble recently cause I was getting all my "food" through pic lines in my arms 10 hours each night and cellcept 2 hours each day for 11 months. Couldn't take any oral anti-depressants..withdrew & quit talking to my few friends.
Pic lines, ports..I hate those devices permanently inserted- they're so ugly. I had surgery this month and am getting weaned off all my pic line meds.
It sounds like your pancreas is working and that's a huge factor. Gotta keep the organs working.
I have 2 cats, a dog and other small pets. Cats are much easier to care for than dogs if you aren't allergic. Clean the box once a day as opposed to walking the dog twice a day. Although with a small toy dog you can potty train them to go on wee pads (I suggest) an extra large pad holder too. Regardless cats do okay when you're away for a few days while dogs can go crazy & distructive. Perhaps you have family who could take the toy when you're in the hospital?
Anyway, I'm so sorry you've been so sick and I hope you get back to our "normal" lupus state soon. Love, Butterflake aka Donna