*I think meeting one of your goals is awesome and I'd rather be fed than clean if I had to choose.
Have you looked into a self-cleaning litter box?
I have two versions - offspring do one cat's box, and I keep a bedroom window open for my cat ;)
Seriously, I got one for my MIL and it worked great, until she decided to submerge it in a full bathtub - I see them on Craigslist cheap a few times a week (but not as cheap as my open window for Maxi).
Laura aka tenXmom
AIH - Lupus - RA