As Lynnwood said your symptoms seem more like an autoimmune disease and a rheumy would be the best specialist to see for AI diseases. Keep in mind that you might not have lupus and it might be something else. Best case would be to go to a teaching hospital with both rheumies and neuros who could team up if necessary to diagnose your condition. Ignoring clinical symptoms is beyond me....you need a different doctor. Just because the doctor doesn't know what you have doesn't justify dismissing your symptoms.
Where do you live? Are there any large hospitals/clinics in your area? Ones like Mayos, Cleveland Clinic, Northwestern...there are many around the country. Some of them will have teams set up to handle difficult diagnoses. You might start with one doctor but end up with another.
Doctors are trained to look for horses (very common) not zebras (rare diseases that are not common) and some are better than others doing these difficult diagnoses.
Hope you can find an answer and start some sort of treatment to relieve your symptoms.
MCTD (SLE Lupus, polymyositis, scleroderma). Diagnosed 2005. Kidney, liver, GI tract, dysphagia, raynauds, barretts esophagus, quadriplegic in 2005. Recovered and now active in downhill skiing, golf, hiking. Meds: amlodipine, benezapril, omeprazole, potassium, folic acid, vitamins, maxide.
Remain Optimistic and you can overcome.