This flare is getting the best of me!

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Barbara Lee
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2003
Total Posts : 2889
   Posted 7/28/2013 10:36 PM (GMT -6)   
Hey all:

Have to say that I've really not improved since my cataract surgery on June 17th. I'm in the middle of a huge flare up and I'm a total mess.

My toe and finger joints hurt so bad I can't move them. I'm just so sick of all of this crap. I mean I'm always in a flare, but it's 100% worse than it has been in a long time. It's day's like today when I wish my leukemia would just end things for me.

I was in the Dr's office on Friday for acute care and he did nothing other than order me x-rays of my foot. I had some very stressful stuff go on last week and I've finally crashed so to speak. Today, my temp was 103.5 when I woke up from a nap. It's now 101.3, my joints feel like they are on fire.

I know that I've got fluid around my heart as I'm having major chest pain, and my breathing is really bad tonight. Just checked my oxygen saturation and it's sitting at 89% with me wearing 2 liters of oxygen on.

I just am so frustrated, the Doctor that saw me on Friday, had the nerve to ask me what keeps me going and not giving up on life. I answered truthfully and said I'm not sure anymore. I really don't know what's keeping me alive these days. I have so much going on and have so many issues with my health. If I were someone's pet I'd have been put down long ago.

Stress that's in my life isn't making things any easier either. Hubby is affected by the government furlough, daughter needs tuition money for college, having issues around our neighborhood/house, cat is well on some days not so on others, worried about hubby as it's sounding like things will carry onto the new fiscal year on his job. I'm really surprised I've not had a nervous breakdown yet.

I'll have my left cataract surgery done on August 5th. Please pray that all goes well and my flare up doesn't get worse by having the surgery done. The tendonitis in my Achilles is terrible and nothing is working on that end. The only thing I can say that seems to be helping me right now is my Therapist. At least, she's getting why I'm so agitated and upset 24/7. Not to mention my pain issues, I swear the Doctors will just ignore me until my PCM agrees to increase something.

I barely can walk around in my bedroom. I was hoping that I looked better when my daughter gets home on the 4th of August. Guessing that won't be the case. Please keep me in your prayers and positive thoughts. I'm desperate and in need of as much assistance as I can get. I thank you all for being here for me and supporting me in my times of need.

I'm keeping you all in my prayers and please take care everyone. I know you are always here, if I need you. I hope that all of you are sleeping and having a comfy night. May your week be good. Take care and I'll try to post again soon.

Hugs,
Barbara
DX- RA, Lupus, Fibro, LGL Leukemia, Pulmonary Hypertension, Bells Palsy, Gastroparsis, Blood Clots, Cateracts, Glaucoma, Chronic Pericarditis & Pleurisy, Severe Anemia. Way to many medications to list.

Lynnwood
Forum Moderator


Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 7720
   Posted 7/28/2013 10:40 PM (GMT -6)   
Barb,
Are you sure you should be having the eye surgery just now? Has the first eye healed up?

Check for me in chat!
Lynnwood, Lupus & Sjogren's Moderator
DIAGNOSING LUPUS & LUPUS RESOURCES
"Life is far too important to be taken seriously" - Oscar Wilde

Butterflake
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jun 2006
Total Posts : 1650
   Posted 7/29/2013 7:33 AM (GMT -6)   
(((Barbara))) I'm sorry you're in such terrible pain. I'm also one of those who is in a constant low level flare and get hit with mega flares. Fortunately with lasik I'm having some good days and the mega flares only last a few days. You on the other hand, never get a break.
 
You know that all of your stress is working against you, but it's really hard to break that cycle isn't it? I hope your daughter is kind to you while she's there. After seeing the debt of my daughter's student loan, I'm not a fan of them, but your daughter may have to get a loan, or your husband get one for her.
 
I know it's difficult for you to see new specialists, but a podiatrist worked wonders with my foot pain by injecting steroids in a precise spot.
 
I think Lynnwood has a good point about postponing your second cataract surgery.
 
Well Dear, I think of you often and you are in my prayers. Love Ya, Donna
Lupus '05, Sjogrens, fibro, major depressive disorder, CNS problems, GERD, colitis, 1st stage kidney disease. Many meds: better living through chemistry

Donna
Sjogren's Moderator

couchtater
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 14475
   Posted 7/29/2013 11:38 AM (GMT -6)   
((((((((((Gentle hug))))))))))))
Please try to rest, honey.
I'm sorry you're feeling so bad now.
Joy
Lupus, Fibromyalgia, Glaucoma, Asthma, Hypothyriodism, Sleep Apnea, OA, Depression, and Allergies

When life throws you lemons....
Pick them up and throw them right back at them! :))

oreo11
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2011
Total Posts : 399
   Posted 7/29/2013 7:55 PM (GMT -6)   
 
Hi Barbara,
 
       I feel at a loss as to what to say to you.  Your struggles with Lupus make my heart ache.  Like other people, I wonder if a second surgery would be good for you right now??  It sounds like you have so many stressors in your life, and we all know that Lupus flares big time when stress overwhelms us.  Taking care of yourself should be the number one priority right now.  A gentle and warm ((((((((((((((((((((((HUG))))))))))))))))))))))) is coming your way.
 
Love,
Laura
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