This is a mini-vent. I had been feeling pretty darned great this summer. Even with the hospitalization at the end of May for Atrial Fibrillation and Knee surgery in June, I seemed to bounce back. I had more energy and was experiencing another remission. I kept telling myself "Maybe this is it!!!" Well, I started back to work last week and this is the first week back with students. I came home yesterday with the type of fatigue that you know is not the simple tiredness you get at the end of a long work day. I promptly fell asleep on my husband while he was talking to me. When I woke up, I felt foggy-headed and malaisy. As the evening wore on I became more fatigued and then the joint pain kicked in-hands, feet, hips. With that came the profound sense of heaviness throughout my body. To make a long story short, I was angry. My husband tried to reason with me, but I was unreasonable. I had had two months of bliss and was caught off guard...again. Every time this happens, I get let down by my body. And it frustrates me. It really shows me how much work stress acts to trigger a flare...not always....but something about this week has brought it on. Thankfully, I can up the Prednisone for a few days, which I know will help. But I get so disappointed in myself for having to be dependent on these medications to keep my body in balance. I felt icky today, but chose to go to work and now I am paying the price. Sometimes I just wish this disease would disappear for good!!!
Thanks for hearing me out.