Welcome to our forum LupieLain! First let me say that at the top of our lupus forum is a resources link that many of us help write and I think you'll find it very useful. Secondly, your inability to reason is known commonly as "lupus fog" and you will find some days are much worse than others. Try not to be frightened- it's just one of the many unfortunate symptoms of lupus.
Take all your meds. If you're on psych meds (I've been on them for years) stay on them.
Be your own advocate by learning as much as you can about lupus, keeping a list of symptoms and problems to address with your rheumatologist, and if your treatment isn't going well seek another rheumatologist for a second opinion.
Lastly, get as much rest as you possibly can each day. A few years ago someone told this story: One of her young children was asked at school to draw a picture of what their mother liked to do best. He drew a pic of her lying on a bed. Teacher asked why and he said mommy likes to rest. Now the mommy found this very depressing, but to me it meant that she was taking care of herself, as she should.
This initial period you're going thru is really rough until the meds get lupus under control. Some lupies go into remission, and the majority always take meds and lead productive, fulfilling, long lives. It's really a very small percentage who die young. So, take a deep relaxing breath. I know how terrible you feel right now both physically and mentally, but in time you will feel much better.
I really hope that you will find the time to tell us how you're doing. Stop by to ask questions, reply to others, or simply to rant and vent. There's always someone here to listen. Love, Butterflake
SLE '05, Sjogrens, fibro, Raynaud's, major depressive disorder, CNS problems, diastolic heart failure, GERD, 1st stage kidney disease. Many meds: better living through chemistry