Hi Joy, Laura, Diane, and UA:
Thanks for your support. I'm really struggling here and I'm not sure what to do with myself I feel so bad. I went yesterday to get my massage and it ended up being a TOTAL BUST.
I filled out the paperwork that is required, well there's a question about
having cancer. So, of course, I answered yes that I have leukemia. Well the receptionist took the paperwork back to the therapist. about
5 minutes later they both come out and say, "I'm so sorry, but I can't give you a massage without a letter from your Dr. Plus after you get the letter you'll need to to sign a release form regarding your cancer,"
What the heck, I mean I'm suffering in so much pain I can barely stand up straight, and you want me to get a Dr's letter, talking about
my leukemia. I swear everyone is so scared of getting sued these days. It's not like the massage is going to do anything to my leukemia. I've been getting massages since 1988.
So here I sit with my pain levels thru the roof. My left foot is hurting so badly and when Matt worked on it at PT today, he was like you're getting worse. I was like, yep, I know. Friday won't be here soon enough for me. I sure hope the Dr has some much needed answers and treatment for it.
Here it's the week before Christmas and I'm just stuffing envelopes with cards. I'm not able to sign them, and Bill didn't want to write anything in them. So most folks are just getting a plain card. Good thing I special order my cards with our family names printed in them, at least people will know who it's from. There's isn't one decoration put up and there is NO WAY I can do it.
My breathing is much worse, I've added an additional two pillows under me at night. I somehow have this picture in my mind that next week I'll be hanging out in the hospital instead of at home. I'm sick of this I just want to be well or be out of here. Currently I look like I've got a major sun burn going on. Every night I seem to get these really red cheeks. There are really hot and I'm talking fire engine red. Any ideas why I've got this going on now.
I do have one good piece of news in my dark world. My right thumb has started to grow skin back.
I no longer need to put the cream with the silver and antibiotic in it onto the thumb. I'm even down to just wearing a large (LARGE) band aid on that thumb. My left thumb isn't doing as well though. However, the left thumb has had radiation twice and the warts were much worse on that one. I'm not going out on a limb yet stating that the warts are gone on the right thumb. It looks promising though, lets pray they stay away forever.
Well, I'm headed off to bed. I hope you are all doing fine and having much less pain than I am. Sleep well, and enjoy your day tomorrow. Will stop by tomorrow sometime, I only see my shrink at 2:00 tomorrow.
DX- RA, Lupus, Fibro, LGL Leukemia, Obstructive & Central Sleep Apnea, Pulmonary Hypertension, Bells Palsy, Gastroparsis, Blood Clots, Glaucoma, Chronic Pericarditis & Pleurisy, Severe Anemia. Way to many medications to list.