I showed my boyfriend your post since he has had some similar issues. He's been diagnosed with Behcet's Disease and RA. He also suffered from long term TMJ issues. After 12 years of the bones decaying he ended up having both TMJ's replaced.
Prior to the joint replacement he also had horrible sleep apnea. Because his mouth didn't close properly at night he would wake up once every 30 seconds and almost never got into REM sleep. Like you, he was always tired, wanting to sleep during the day but having a difficult time doing so at night.
One other note, he had a very difficult time getting insurance to cover the TMJ replacement as they wanted to call it dental. After the sleep study and diagnosis of severe sleep apnea, the insurance couldn't deny it and immediately authorized.
Finding the right doctors is everything Becky. Some may make you feel like a hypochondriac, others simply don't see enough cases like us to properly diagnose them. Keep searching, find the right docs.
DX- SLE, Arthritis, DDD Lumbar, Hypertension, Hypothyroidism, Diabetes, and MDD
Medicines - Methotrexate, Folic Acid, Hydrocodeine, Etodolac, Ibuprofen, Acetaminophen, tizanidine, Norvasc, Levothyroxine, Metformin, Glipizide, and Viibryd