So I don't ask for a lot of support from people. I live alone and get a lot of support from my best friend, but unless something is really necessary I try not to ask for support or to expect it.
So Sunday afternoon my (upstairs) washing machine sprung a leak while full of water. I was in the (downstairs) kitchen and only noticed this when the drop ceiling (those acoustical tiles) drops down onto the floor.
So I call my BF, who is working but can make her own hours, to bring over the shop vac. While she is here she spends a few minutes emptying a closet (which water is dropping down into) and mopping, but probably is only here less than an hour.
The day before (Saturday), we'd gone a a short (1 hour total) hike over uneven ground. Lately my Lupus problem-of-the-day has been serious inflammation and neuropathy on the bottoms of my feet. It flared up rather badly while we were walking -- I didn't even say anything, but guess I was walking like my feet hurt since she asked about them later in the day. Sunday they were still hurting enough so I'd starting in on a short burst of prednisone.
So anyway, after I got the water turned off and vacuumed/mopped as much as possible Sunday, I took meds and retired to my bed!! (Seemed the safest place to be.) Oh, that was after calling the plumber and my insurance agent.
Monday I talked to plumber & more insurance folks, but mostly nursed my feet. (Had to cancel my gym appt due to feet....sigh. That appt is kinda' a mental health break for me.) I worked on cleaning up some bits here & there, but not too much. BF came over & took me out to dinner Monday evening. All seemed well.
Tuesday plumber came, so did a floor remediation company -- turned out to be washer, not a plumbing problem, and not really enough water to involve the flood people. (Insurance made me call them.) BF & I went out to dinner again. Note that when I get stressed I loose my appetite and have no idea where or what to eat.
So today (Wednesday) I talked to a couple of repair people, have a washing machine guy coming - guys I talked to about kitchen ceiling repair (plus I figured it was a good time to throw in the rest of the to-do list) didn't seem all that interested. Said they'd call back, but I don't feel like they will.
So after work, BF called - we updated about each others day, and when I said I didn't think repair guys would call back --- man, I somehow opened the wrong door. Got a full-on lecture about how depressed I am, that I never do anything about it, etc. etc. Note I hadn't said anything about depression! Yeah, these things exhaust me. No, they weren't so much of a problem before Lupus. Didn't they (therapists seen in the '80's) teach you any coping skills? You weren't like this before the fog! (The fog refers to 4-5 years when my cognitive dysfunction was CNS involvement including massive drop in measurable IQ - not your ordinary Lupus or Fibro fog.)
Don't know where this came from. Yes,mid-Nov to early-Jan is the bad time of year for me. Always has been, since my mothers death 27 years ago. I haven't mentioned it, and felt like I've been maintaining just fine. Really pissed me off. What am I supposed to be doing? Dancing with bells on because the house flooded??
And of course to top it off tomorrow is my birthday. BF & I generally spend the day together. At the moment I don't even want to talk to her. And sadly, nobody else around to vent to but you guys.
In the summer they had me on 450 mg Wellbutrin -- a high, high dose. It wasn't really helping, so I stopped -- and felt better! Hard to consider talk therapy -- last time I saw one of those the therapist ended up testifying against me in a nasty divorce case. (She lied.)
So, if you read all that -- no need for a big reply, I just needed to vent. Thanks for reading!