Hello, I am Kitt and I am new here.
I read your post and it sounds like you have had a long extended bout with your disease process.
The thing I notice most is the lack of support of your husband. I have depression and when I was at my worse, my husband appeared unsuportive and even got mad and said he was going to lose it himself as he did not know what to do to help me.
I needed someone to hold me and tell me it would be ok and he was the person I needed. Perhaps your husband is having difficulties watching you go through all of this pain.
Do you think you could talk to him in a calm and esay manner and tell him what you need? ((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))
"A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor's book."