I struggle with this, too. I always feel so guilty when I need to ask my husband to pick up the slack in an area that I feel I should manage because I can no longer work outside the home. It's just that some days, I can't manage to do much INSIDE the home, either!
I think my biggest struggle is in telling people no when it comes to doing things. I went to Florida with a friend last weekend. She had never been to that part of the state, and wanted to go, go, GO all the time. I went along with it, because this trip was something of a thank you gift to her for some things she did for me in the past. But by the time we were headed to the airport to come home Monday, I was seriously hurting. I was exhausted.
Funny thing is, it didn't trigger a multi-day flare like I thought it would. I felt pretty normal by Wednesday morning. Maybe the plaquenil is FINALLY helping a bit?
Anyway, yes, it's very hard to ask for help...it's hard to admit when we can't do things we used to do. I think pride definitely plays a factor in this, but I think it's also, for me anyway, a desire to please others and not be a burden to anyone. I still struggle with anger over the fact that I'm not the person I was a few years ago. I still battle fully accepting this as my new reality, KWIM?