Posted 9/23/2007 5:14 PM (GMT -6)
Hello to everyone. Thank you SO much to every single one of you who replied to my post about my Prissaloo. Thank you for sharing your own painful losses as well. I don't know what I would do without this forum. I know I don't know each of you personally, but you each speak from the heart and you would not believe the comfort that provides. Certain members of my own family are aware of my loss and know better than I was able to explain to you in my original post how much Prissy meant to me, yet they say very little and some don't even call at all. I just don't understand how disconnected our world has become. I am taking this very slowly. I went to a local florist and purchased a real wooden cross that is stained really pretty. As I talked with him about Prissy, he made a beautiful, puffy ribbon bow with pink flowers coming out of either side of it to affix to the cross. My bf buried her under the trees at my mom's where we've buried loved pets in past years. I can go visit and just sit under the shade of those trees any time if I need to. She was my baby. I know God gave me Prissy at a time shortly after my wreck when I needed her company awfully bad. She has had her own share of health problems through the years and I think that was what helped her be so gentle and understanding when I needed her most. It just came to a point this week when I could no longer bear to see her suffer for my sake. I had to give her back to God to take care of her. That was honestly the absolute hardest thing I've ever had to do in my whole life. The ONLY thing that my sanity rest's in is knowing that my sweet baby who has been there for me for so many years isn't limping around and licking the blood from her nose like she's had to do since June. I am sitting here now crying like a baby, but I know this is part of the process and I just wanted to send a heart felt thank you to each one of you.
Always looking for the silver lining, Sharen

SLE '06, Sjogren's '06, Traumatic Head Injury '94
Prednisone 10mg and tapering, Caltrate 1200mg, Multi-vitamin, Prevacid 30 mg, Actonel 35mg

Posted 9/23/2007 9:49 PM (GMT -6)
Some hot tea, a box of tissue, great chocolates and a big hug for you Sharen . . . It is a very hard thing you are going through. I'm sorry those around you don't understand. I was blessed to have the consoling arms of my hubby to get me through the loss of our dear Chelsea. I hope there is a special understanding person who shows up for you too. You are right . . . most people are clueless of what we go through when we lose such a special friend.

You are in my thoughts and prayers sis.

Blessings!

In His Grip

AlwaysRosie           "We can't control the waves, but we can learn how to surf!!"

Psalms 139

Co-Moderator - Lupus Forum

UCTD, Hashimotos, Inflammatory Bowel, Inflammatory Arthritis

Clickable Links:  Lupus Resources    Lupous.Org   Lupus Criteria (4 of 11)   Lupus Chapter Locator

Posted 9/23/2007 10:53 PM (GMT -6)
Sharen,

I'm so glad your bf was there for you. The spot at your mom's sounds just perfect. I'm so happy for you that you found a beautiful cross that pleases you so much.

As so many of the others have said, I too have special family members of the four legged type in my family. With each of them but one who had a tragic accident, it was a condition that led to having to have them put down. We also we able to have a lovely spot to bury them and that really help ease our pain.

Cry your tears but trust that in the weeks to come you will be able to remember her with love without sobbing (just a few tears) and eventually a sad smile. She will always, always be in your heart.

xoxo emmie
</FONT>

SLE, limited scleroderma, Sjogrens, Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, seizure disorder, Raynauds, Hashimoto's (or Autoimmune) Enchephalopathy

Posted 9/24/2007 2:36 PM (GMT -6)
Oh Sharen--
I really feel so bad for you. It is so awful seeing your pet suffer and then be gone. Please remember there is some lucky dog out there on death row in a shelter, or waiting for a home somewhere that may not replace your Prissy but will fill that empty spot in the household and be very very grateful for the chance to be your pet. I know that I just can't stand the silent household without my dogs. Its awful. I feel for you and sorry I haven't been out much. Been getting sick with gi now that I'm off the pred. Many (((hugs))) and maybe, in her memory, you can give another dog a wonderful home someday. I'm so sorry this has happened to you and Prissy. It just hurts. Everyone has said so many good things, there isn't much I can add except that again I'm so sorry and I know what you are going through.
Love, Marji
--Doctors are men who prescribe medicines of which they know little, to cure diseases of which they know less in human beings of whom they know nothing.--Voltaire (1694-1778)
Ills--Sjogrens-Lupus-like AI Disease, Hashis, Vitiligo, spinal stenosis/fusion with plate, salivary/lymphectomies, Diabetes, NAFLD, COPD, RLS, neuropathy, trigonitis, hystero, diffuse brain atrophy
Meds--Plaquenil, Evoxac, Metformin, Synthroid, HCTZ, Estradiol patch, Prosed, Klonopin, Soma, Ultram, Vicodin, Restasis, Albuterol,steroid injections, Protopic & Triamcinolone Acetonide ointments

Posted 9/24/2007 9:27 PM (GMT -6)

Hey Sharen,

I thought of a poem that someone sent me when our Chelsea passed.   Thought you might like too.  Here is the link:  The Rainbow Bridge

Blessings!

In His Grip

AlwaysRosie           "We can't control the waves, but we can learn how to surf!!"

Psalms 139

Co-Moderator - Lupus Forum

UCTD, Hashimotos, Inflammatory Bowel, Inflammatory Arthritis

Clickable Links:  Lupus Resources    Lupous.Org   Lupus Criteria (4 of 11)   Lupus Chapter Locator

Posted 9/24/2007 10:48 PM (GMT -6)
Thank you all again. I did a little better today...not quite so many breakdowns, but then I had an appt. this morning so my mind was much busier today. I did go by my mom's and visit Prissy's place after my appt. My bf has also been very understanding and talks me through the upsets whenever he can. Everyone's words here are also very special. I appreciate you all so much. Each person has shared personal feelings involving their own pets. I needed each and every one of them and thank you all so much. I did just want to say to Rosie that the poem you included the link to was very special. I have printed that and will leave it on my nightstand to read over and think about as I'm going to bed each night. Thanks again to everyone and I'm remembering each of you in my prayers for whatever you may be dealing with right now.
Always looking for the silver lining, Sharen

SLE '06, Sjogren's '06, Traumatic Head Injury '94
Prednisone 10mg and tapering, Caltrate 1200mg, Multi-vitamin, Prevacid 30 mg, Actonel 35mg

Posted 9/25/2007 8:53 AM (GMT -6)
I wanted to share a poem with you as well... I think its very beautiful

I Stood By Your Bed
"Des"
Co-Moderator ~ IBS Forum & Co-Moderator ~ Lupus Forum 
Dx: IBS 1989, Diverticulosis 2004, Idiopathic Acute Colitis 2006, UCTD 2007
Meds: Plaquenil 400mg, Chlorzoxazone 500mg, Lyrica 50mg, Protonix 40mg, Lodine XL 1000mg, Klonopin PRN, Miralax 17g, Supplements


http://www.healingwell.com/donate
 
Lupus & Diverticulitis flare (Flagyl 500 mg/3, Levaquin 500 mg, Zofran 4mg PRN for nausea, Hydrocodone 500mg PRN for pain)

Posted 9/25/2007 11:02 AM (GMT -6)
OK Des . . . I know that poem was for Sharen . . . but I'm actually crying! That was so touching! Thank you for sharing.

In His Grip

AlwaysRosie           "We can't control the waves, but we can learn how to surf!!"

Psalms 139

Co-Moderator - Lupus Forum

UCTD, Hashimotos, Inflammatory Bowel, Inflammatory Arthritis

Clickable Links:  Lupus Resources    Lupous.Org   Lupus Criteria (4 of 11)   Lupus Chapter Locator

Posted 9/25/2007 3:57 PM (GMT -6)
Thanks so much Des. You guys are awesome! I printed that one too. There are also some great pet loss resources in the "links" section at the bottom of the page. I really appreciate you all. Thank you,
Always looking for the silver lining, Sharen

SLE '06, Sjogren's '06, Traumatic Head Injury '94
Prednisone 10mg and tapering, Caltrate 1200mg, Multi-vitamin, Prevacid 30 mg, Actonel 35mg

Posted 9/25/2007 4:09 PM (GMT -6)
Hi Sharen, I'm sorry I didn't post before but my energy level has been at a minimum. Our pet's are so much more than pets. They are part of our family. We go through so much together. It's hurts badly when we loose them. I lost my cat when I moved to oklahoma. She was 18 years old and very poor health. She was one that liked to roam so she knew the neighbors porch as well as my house. I knew she would never be able to make the trip to ok. so I left her with them. They are my dearest friends. So she got to spend her last days in the place that she had always known and had another cat to pal around with. I sent them money to care for her which they didn't care one way or another about but I needed to do that. Anyway they called me 6 months later to tell me she was gone and that they buried her on the property. I have so many wonderful memories that if I started to tell you about them I'm sure I would start crying again. The daymy husband died (she was his cat) she came in my room and meowed at me until I woke up. That was about 2 mins. before the hospital called at 6 am. She never did that before. but she was right there for the phone call. Than on this trip my SIL called and said I hate to tell youthis but Taco has been missing since yesterday! I handled it very well until the last when I said just call me if you hear anything. Anyway the good news is he ran off from their house and they found him on the porch at my house! Thank God for that. I'm glad you're having a better day. Hang in there I'll catch up more when I get back.
love ya
carol
God Bless
Carol
Lupus, possible Crest, COPD, Cervical Cancer survivor. Osteoporosis
Prednisone 5mg, Plaquanil 800mg,Evista60mg, Effexor 150mg, HCTZ25/Triamterene37.5mg,Xanax x3
 
Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you: 1. Jesus Christ 2. The American G. I
 
 
 

Posted 9/25/2007 10:45 PM (GMT -6)
Hi, Carol. Just seeing your name made me cry (before I even read your post). I've missed you! I'll be glad when you're back. Take care of yourself. I don't think you need to worry about me, everyone here has really reached out more than I ever imagined and that has really been comforting. Right now, I am just trying to force myself to realize that I did what I had to do so my stupid brain will just leave me alone with the guilt. I think my head injury must play some part in this. Surely normal people don't question themselves this much? I'm sure this will get easier as more time passes. It's just really slow going right now. My emotional roller coaster has sent my blood sugar sky rocketing even though I'm following my "good foods" that I found to keep it under control. I just hope I am doing better emotionally in a couple of weeks because that's when I'm supposed to start the new taper. Thanks for dropping me a note. Take care and we look forward to your return,
Always looking for the silver lining, Sharen

SLE '06, Sjogren's '06, Traumatic Head Injury '94
Prednisone 10mg and tapering, Caltrate 1200mg, Multi-vitamin, Prevacid 30 mg, Actonel 35mg

Posted 9/26/2007 2:37 AM (GMT -6)
Sharen, just a note to tell you I'm thinking about you.

(((Hugs))))

Pat
Lupus, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Sjogren's, osteoarthritis, fibro, ibs, renauds, restless leg, hiatal hernia, double vision, migraines.
cellcept, neurontin, prednisone, plaquenil, synthroid, triamterene, tramadol, actonel, tri-est, imitrex, cymbalta, multivitamin, calcium w vit D, fish oil, aspirin

Posted 9/26/2007 7:18 PM (GMT -6)
Hi, Pat. I really appreciate everyone's support. I know this forum is for lupus issues and I am trying to get past this, but it's got me...bad! I have never grieved so much or so hard even over a person before; but then fortunately I haven't experienced too much death. I just really took Prissy for granted because I guess I had her for so long. She really helped me so much after my accident and even since this lupus took off. I miss her and I even miss how tiring it was becoming taking care of her. She really meant the world to me. I really thank you for reaching out. This has got to get easier. It has been a week tonight since the big incident and I only have more week before I am supposed to start a new taper. Any prayers for settling my spirit over this would be much appreciated.
Always looking for the silver lining, Sharen

SLE '06, Sjogren's '06, Traumatic Head Injury '94
Prednisone 10mg and tapering, Caltrate 1200mg, Multi-vitamin, Prevacid 30 mg, Actonel 35mg

Posted 9/26/2007 8:58 PM (GMT -6)
Sharen . . . I am SO connecting with you over this. I was actually ashamed for the grief I felt over losing my Chelsea. Please do allow yourself to grieve . . . but do NOT feel guilty for freeing her from her ill body . . . you were doing a decent thing for her when you let her go. W/O your help, she would have died way before this.

I'm still ashamed to admit it, but it was harder than some people funerals . . . our pets are integral parts of every minute in our home. A good dog will sense your emotion better than your best friend and they can respond in just the right way. Your Prissy got you through some extremely difficult times and never complained about and you were there for her too.

I think when we are chronically ill, these pets become our therapists, and our consolation . . . at any rate . . . with a loss for words to describe how deeply attached we become . . . I am sure feeling for you about your loss.

It took almost a year for my husband to consider another puppy and I can tell you that until the moment I took my little Cluny home, I came home each day with a knot in my gut and tears for the emptiness in my home. One dog did not replace the other, but the pup did complete my cycle of grief and begin the healing process. Cluny is now Cluny and Patrick and we have a litter of puppies just 11 days old. I think of you each time I hold my little babies and I'm so sad for your loss sis. Your grieving process will take lots of time and I'm not suggesting a pup before its the right time for you. . . but I can see with another little one licking away your tears and lying next to you while you sleep. I wish that all of our combined sympathy could make this easier for you sis . . . please know that each of us is hurting for you in a way that we wish would subtract that much hurt from you.

Prayers, hugs and blessings sweet sister!

In His Grip

AlwaysRosie           "We can't control the waves, but we can learn how to surf!!"

Psalms 139

Co-Moderator - Lupus Forum

UCTD, Hashimotos, Inflammatory Bowel, Inflammatory Arthritis

Clickable Links:  Lupus Resources    Lupous.Org   Lupus Criteria (4 of 11)   Lupus Chapter Locator

Posted 9/27/2007 9:11 PM (GMT -6)
Hi, Rosie. I did much better today than I did yesterday. I thought it was going to be another really sad day because I woke up in the same sad shape I was in when I went to bed last night. Fortunately, my bf was here and he sat down with me and let me have a good cry and seriously talked to me about what Prissy was going through, how he knew from how he saw her go down especially since the spring of this year that I did the right thing, and we also talked about how very special she is to me. I think it really helped me to get it all out again. We've gone over it and over it already, but he said we could talk like that just as much as I needed to. He also pointed out that it has only been 1 week. I don't think I will ever consider having another dog. Not only has it become physically too much for me, but I don't think I could ever feel as close to another one. I cannot put into words just how Prissy connected with me. I think God picked her for me with all her health problems because he knew of all of mine to come. Thank you for your special understanding. I appreciate every single word that everyone has shared. Thanks so much,
Always looking for the silver lining, Sharen

SLE '06, Sjogren's '06, Traumatic Head Injury '94
Prednisone 10mg and tapering, Caltrate 1200mg, Multi-vitamin, Prevacid 30 mg, Actonel 35mg

Posted 9/27/2007 10:23 PM (GMT -6)
Sharen . . . so glad that your bf was so tender. What a blessing. I'll be thinking about you in the days/weeks ahead.

Blessings!

In His Grip

AlwaysRosie           "We can't control the waves, but we can learn how to surf!!"

Psalms 139

Co-Moderator - Lupus Forum

UCTD, Hashimotos, Inflammatory Bowel, Inflammatory Arthritis

Clickable Links:  Lupus Resources    Lupous.Org   Lupus Criteria (4 of 11)   Lupus Chapter Locator

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