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pcpc
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 214
   Posted 5/11/2009 5:45 AM (GMT -7)   
So here is the morning dilemma for most of us. We are on treatments- herbal, antibiotics, supplements. We are doing better i.e. we can think, our headaches are not keeping us in bed unable to speak, we can eat though most foods are joyless, we can tolerate some noise and light, we are doing okay. Nights are still hellish episodes of heat and cold and sweats and aches. Your family looks at you in the morning, gauging where you are, how you are. Should they ask? Should they offer? So you say it, "I'm okay." What does that mean? Will you still get some help? Will they understand that you still feel as though you are fighting a flu with a touch of madness? Do you take Motrin or Nux vomica, up your vitamins C, or try that inspirational tape that helped so much 3 months ago? Do you go online to see who is posting a new hope or will that just depress you? Are you fighting your daughter's cold or is it the Monday blues? Is it a one year anniversary of treatment or is it the middle of a new protocol designed to kill cysts and 2 co-infections all in one fell swoop. Do you need an IV or a vacation? You are not bad, but you are not great. The weird thing is that if I can fight and power through and not think too much today will be okay. My mornings are like this.

stutterbug
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 478
   Posted 5/11/2009 9:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Sounds like me!

saxmar
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 670
   Posted 5/11/2009 1:13 PM (GMT -7)   
pcpc

I went through a period like that for a few months last year. I told my wife sometimes I would rather have physical pain than the depession, anxiety etc. that Lyme brings with it. Atleast then you can take pain killers.

Mine eventually passed but was replaced by other physical symptoms. That is my pattern with Lyme. One thing goes away and another replaces it.

You will get through this phase of Lyme.

We are sick. We did not chose to be this way. Don't feel guilty for something that's not your fault.

saxmar

dorit
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 375
   Posted 5/11/2009 3:25 PM (GMT -7)   
When reading this thread some memory came up: some time back there was always this one question "are you ok ???? " from my family, waiting for me in the morning like a hammer to fall on me. ... no, I was not; I was not ok, trapped somewhere with something that made me feel sick, sick, sick, tired like crazy, sad, broken down, hopeless, like getting destroyed by something invisible. I did not know that it was Lyme but my skin manifestation started around this time; I had so many fights with my husband about this question and my rage which was mostly my answer, but I felt incredible lonely inside, knowing my life was drifting away from the others and I could not explain it. We shared so many tears back then; he knew I was not fine and helped me so much but we both had no real clue at that time.
Yeah, the mornings always sccared me most; I was crying every morning for nearly a year before I was able to get out of bed; I remember it very well - when I woke up slowly, got my thoughts together, and then this feeling came... a feeling of such an incredible emptiness and such an incredible desire to flee from this, to run away, to escape but I knew the threatening thing was inside myself - I always broke out in tears and cryed. I had the feeling that I could not do anything for me, that I just could not help me. I never had experienced that before. I thank God that I was already an adult person when this was hitting me, imagine all the children who have to go through such horror !!
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