Feel terrible today

I was okay yesterday. Not to where I could run around or anything, but just okay. Yesterday was my youngest daughters birthday. We just did the family thing because I was going to "try" to bring her and some friends to the fair this weekend. Well, today when I woke up, I felt like I had been hit by a truck. I feel like I have fever and my whole body hurts including my fingers and toes. My lymph nodes are swollen, I have the chills and I just feel crappy. It always seems to do this everytime I try to plan something. I actually cried like a little baby today. I haven't cried in a while because I was trying to think positive but I'm just so sick of all of this. I always have to miss out on life and my family suffers right along with me. I can't "plan" anything anymore. I mean, I don't even know what that word means anymore....<sigh>. I'm just fed up with it all. I want to be able to just get up and go when I want to again. Make plans like I used to and KEEP them. I feel like I'm always letting everyone down because I can't ever make it somewhere. I'm always sick!! I'm sorry to be so negative everyone. I'm just not myself today. I was really looking forward to getting out and bringing my daughter to that fair. She will understand because she's such a loving child and she knows what I go through but.....I just want to be able to bring her have some fun. She's always stuck in this house with me. I just want "me" back.

Yeah, I know the feeling well...feeling feverish and in pain and like you've been run over by a truck...and not being able to plan anything because of the unexpected nature of this disease... I was in the hospital during my last birthday and again this Spring during my Husband and I's 10th wedding anniversary. We had to cancel a trip visiting family as well because of the hospital stay this year. It sux but like you say it is good that family seems to understand.

I hope you feel better soon...

Hi CajunGrl.  I am sorry you are feeling so bad.  I think everyone here can relate to your frustrations.  It is not your fault you are sick.  Do you think you could be herxing?

If you cannot go to the fair, maybe you could watch your daughter's favorite movie or do something else low-key with her.

Hang in there okay?  

Hey ticker. How have you been hun?

I'm not herxing yet because I haven't started my meds. I was detoxing my body and taking probiotics and supplements to prepare my body. I should be starting the abx in a few weeks. I get this fever and run down feeling every few weeks. My lymph nodes swell too. I guess it's a co-infection. I felt so terrible. I'm feeling a little better today though.

I found out that the fair is here a whole week so I will be able to bring them next weekend. I feel better about that. I know my daughter doesn't feel like I'm letting her down but I feel that way. Even though I "know" I'm sick, I still cannot get over that feeling of letting others down. I missed my sister-in-laws graduation party and that killed. I really hate this disease.

Thanks for your advice. It's really appreciated.

Yeah, I was going to visit my family the first week of June, in NC, but that isn't happening either. For now it's postponed to the end of August, when I have another week of vacation scheduled. Hope you feel better soon and get to enjoy the fair. How old is your daughter?

I don't know about the co-infections. Do they show up on the western blot or is there another specific test for them? My results are listed on the post on page 3 on the posted question for WB results. It was probably the most important question that I should have asked, and I had it on my list, but I forgot to ask it! I didn't think she was even going to treat me at all. And the questions I did ask, I still don't feel as if have been answered. I am learning a lot more on here, but there is still stuff that confuses me about it all.

yTurquoise,

The co-infection test is done separately. I think mine was sent off to medical laboratories or something like that. I would have to look. It is a good idea to get it done so you know what you're dealing with. If you have co-infections, then you need to take a certain combo of drugs depending on which co-infection you have.

What are you confused about?

Pretty much all of it! The more I find out, the more questions I come up with. But even the Drs. don't agree, and so many people can't even get diagnosed! It's crazy!