Neff, surely it is your illness causing the insomnia and worrying thoughts? You have my sympathies on the insomnia -- that alone can be life wrecking! Let us know hw you are doing, OK?
CajunGrl, normally I would feel good after a 'good cry'. But not lately. It just comes on and it's awful. The bad 'S' word starts invading my mind -- I know it's a disease, because I have no real thoughts or desires of it, it's just the word. Seems to float around in my head, against my will.
Then I hate myself and I hate the whole world. I experience an intense desire to escape. It's really intense. I already know that I am not ready and do not want to leave this world, but I want to just leave and go away somewhere. Away from everyone and everything (except my dogs....) I feel so mentally ill, I have a very strong desire to check myself into a hospital or some kind of rehab, but I can't.
I don't know for sure, because I was having problems prior, too, but it seems that since I started Amox, my mind and body start going down that dark road almost every day, around the same time, in the late afternoon. Whereas, it used to be more sporadic, and had not been daily for a long time.
Sometimes, it does not go away til the next morning. But sometimes, when I can hold out, after I take my xanax and get all ready for bed, I feel some better.
Does anyone else experience this desire to escape? Do you believe it is a part of the disease or part of the treatment?
ps: I have just looked up Amox side effects. Included are volatile mood swings, and unusual thoughts and behavior.
Bit 1972: Acute and chronic tonsillitis, UTI, miscarraige, appendicitis, hypoglycemia, chronic neck pain w/ crushed vertibrae, chronic severe back pain, mitral valve prolapse, depression, resolution?
Bit Mother's Day 2007: Lyme, Babesia microti, hypothyroidism, EBV, HHV6, Parvovirus B19, low adrenals &misc other hormones, depression, anxiety, more of the above.
What don't these nasty bugs cause?
CD57= 60, so we're in pretty good shape.