Welcome! Wow, I used to go trout fishing in Kingston as I live in NY also and met people all over the U.S., Europe, Canada, and even South America who became infected with lyme, thus anyone can get infected no matter where they live.
What I found out years ago is the "host" of most lyme bacteria is the White Footed Mouse and whatever blood-sucking vector feeds on these mice then carry the bacteria thus transmitting it to humans. So it can be mosquitoes, fleas, black flies, spiders, mites, etc. (I became infected with lyme from a spider bite according to skin biopsies). Spiders will trap one of those bugs and eat them so then the spider carries the bacteria.
Anyway, so sorry to hear your wife is suffering but glad you are going to keep your kids!
I became well using alternative medicine (specially, Dr. Jernigan's protocol which consists of taking botanicals and lots of detoxing which I still continue to do).
Since your wife is having so many side effects from conventional medicine, my only suggestion is to buy Dr. J's book and read it, it's a real eye opener! The only place right now the book can be book is here (softcover less money compared to hardcover):
Hope this helps,