I just called the suicide prevention hotline and it was horrible.

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

afiya4health
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2013
Total Posts : 193
   Posted 1/7/2018 9:28 PM (GMT -6)   
I don't even know what to do anymore. I've been crying for the past 5 hours and finally decided to at least try to talk to someone about it. I wanted to call my older sister and tell her I wanted to commit suicide (she's gone through depression before) but then I was scared she'd call my mother and freak her out. So after about an hour of debating with myself I called the suicide prevention hotline.

The guy that answered made me think I was being pranked. So apparently they match you to someone locally when you call, but this guy had a weird, almost fake accent. It's so hard to describe but almost thought it was european or something but apparently it was his actual voice. Second, he asked me for my name and how am I doing? I was telling him about my Lyme and how hard it is (I've been in treatment for over 5 years and I'm 21 years old) and after 5 minutes he's like, "Yeah it is hard dealing with health issues...But you're not considering hurting yourself right? I mean this is the suicide prevention line." Like he actually said that to me. Like duh I know its the suicide line that's why I called!

In the end he basically told me to keep my chin up, look into drinking "alkaline" water and find support groups for lyme disease, and then was like "Thanks for calling!" and that was it. He also mentioned how young I am and that I have so many more years to live. Well guess what? I don't want to live with this disease anymore. And I don't want to live with the fear of going into remission and always being scared of a relapse. That's no way to live.

I just want it all to end. I want to die. I want to kill myself. I've been suffering with this since I was 9 and I am now 21 turning 22 this week. IDGAF about my birthday. I've lost so many friends, I can't even live and eat like a regular person my age. I have to deal with horrible symptoms. After being with my 1st doctor for 5 years I finally leave him to go see this other doctor that this lady convinces me to see JUST for her to tell me yesterday that she and her son may be relapsing. Like there's no end to this. How do I live in NJ, a state with so much lyme disease, and there is no competent llmds??? And I don't have the money to go to that german clinic to get well.

You know when people say Lyme disease made them stronger? Thats BS. It made me weaker. It gave me PTSD, ptsd that i constantly experience because the symptoms themselves are triggers. It made me neurotic, and depressed and suicidal. It made me lose weight and lose friends. My family doesn't take me seriously. And yet because I don't look sick, I'm forced to go to college and get a part time job because that's what normal people my age do. I'm trapped.

I'm going to cut this rant short because I just want to go back to bed and continuing crying. Basically if you think just because you call the suicide prevention hotline they will help, think again. Apparently I'm too young to be thinking about suicide and be taken serious.

PeteZa
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2015
Total Posts : 9729
   Posted 1/7/2018 9:44 PM (GMT -6)   
afiya4health I am so sorry you were not treated well. That is so sad that you cried out for help and got nothing. I so feel for you.

I have almost been healed for 2 years now and yep, I get a twinge and still wonder "is lyme coming back?" People say I will get over that, but so far..... I'm still scared.

However, I am an example of a healed person. So I hope I can give you hope. My hubby is healed also. I think we both were lucky to get treated so quickly after being bit.

And, I did not know a thing about lyme disease when I got bit. I still know very little.

I don't like coming here some days because it is so sad to read about everyone suffering and for so friggin long. Oh my gosh.... and the expense..... and the friends and family..... I think there are some tough people here.

I saw this on my other local lyme group and it gave so many people inspiration, including me.

I hope it helps. /www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sUKoKQlEC4

Just know that I care and I believe that you can make it.

Never Give Up!!

Girlie
Forum Moderator


Date Joined May 2014
Total Posts : 32685
   Posted 1/7/2018 10:05 PM (GMT -6)   
afiya4health - I'm sorry that you experienced that...and that you are feeling so badly right now.


Please don't give up. 5 years seems like a really long time, but you are young and you have your whole life ahead of you.
We are here for you...and we understand how difficult it is dealing with this disease...
It could be tomorrow...or next week...when you start to improve and feel better...just keep fighting.


I don't know which number you called, but if you feel the need again...here are a few more numbers.

I know you didn't get an appropriate response...but maybe one of these other options would have someone compassionate to listen to you.

NDMDA Depression Hotline | Support Group. 800-826-3632

Suicide Prevention Services Crisis Hotline 800-784-2433

Suicide Prevention Services Depression Hotline 630-482-9696


Crisis Help Line | For Any Kind of Crisis 800-233-4357


Suicide & Depression Hotline | Covenant House 800-999-9999

((((hugs))))
Moderator, Lyme Forum
Symp started April/2013; Buhner's Lyme May 15-July24/14; Igenex pos. July 3/14
Doxy: July 4-Aug.24/14;Zithro July26-Aug24/14; Amox + Proben. Aug. 29/14;
added biaxin Sept. 26/14
Disc. amox,added Ceftin Nov. 20th.;
Disc. biaxin added Buhner bart herbs Dec/14;Jan/15 pulsing Tinda (w/ Ceftin);
Abx/herb break Apr-July/15; July-mino; Aug. added Rif;
Nov./15 mino - to biaxi

magoo2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2015
Total Posts : 1246
   Posted 1/7/2018 10:13 PM (GMT -6)   
Sorry for the tough times. I never got that far but did set a date when I would have-which gave me an excuse to try everything I could. Hang in there the body can heal.

What helped me the most was a doc in St. Louis who found and treated parasites-aggressively and he found dental issues and got me to a biological dds. After that I knew I could heal.

The clinic is call Prevention and Healing in St. Louis.

Lightlife
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2017
Total Posts : 185
   Posted 1/7/2018 10:45 PM (GMT -6)   
I know it Suk's so bad. Others don't get it unless they get it. I know it made me so so sad. You know what it is you are dealing with which is good as many don't. You are a warrior. Look for the right treatment for relief. The bruhner protocol is what I finally found relief with. His book healing Lyme is so cheap but worth millions of lives. Life is so precious and I'm sorry yours is being hijacked. Take it back. You can do it. Once you get symptoms in control you should feel so much better. . And will worry less about relapse. Someday soon there might be more/ better treatment options. People here can walk you through it if you want to go herbal. This place helped me so much. You really are amazing and special... if you provide a symptom list, others can give you ideas of herbs to try to ease your pain. There is relief.

Post Edited (Lightlife) : 1/7/2018 9:51:03 PM (GMT-7)


The Dude Abides
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2017
Total Posts : 1135
   Posted 1/8/2018 2:00 AM (GMT -6)   
Dear afiya4health,

I'm very sorry for the careless attitude you received from the hotline you called. Obviously, the person with whom you spoke was not properly trained to handle a person in crisis. You did the right thing by calling the hotline. Unfortunately, they let you down.

If you would permit me to make a suggestion, I'd ask that you call one of the other hotline numbers that Girlie mentioned in her reply. Or, for more urgent help, please consider having a close, trusted friend/relative go with you to your nearest Emergency Room.

The way you were treated on that hotline really angers me. Of course, you're not too young to get sick, have troubles, or be taken serious. The folks on this forum take you serious, I promise. We've all suffered in various ways for varying lengths of time -- some people for 20, 30, or more years. The good news is that many people have healed and moved-on with their lives.

I think it's a good sign, too, that, despite how bad you feel mentally, physically, and emotionally, you are still concerned about your Mother. To me, this proves the "normal" part of you in still present. All the other thoughts and feelings are not the real you. That is your brain being hijacked by Lyme Disease and Co-Infections. We've seen it over-and-over again in this community. Once people start treating, they start getting better, and the negative voices, thoughts, and symptoms start improving.

Oh, by the way, speaking of treating, many people have healed from Lyme Disease and Co-Infections without going to a clinic in Germany. Some people have done it with local providers in their town, some have done Skype consultations with providers in other states or countries, and some have healed on their own by reading books and taking supplements at home. This is not a complete list, of course. But, you get the idea. Most people have done many different things, until they found what worked for them.

Many of us with "Lyme Brain" have trouble reading and/or concentrating. But, if/when you're able, please consider reviewing any of the following resources:

buhnerhealinglyme.com
buhnerhealinglyme.com/resources/herbalists
/www.amazon.com/Stephen-Harrod-Buhner/e/B000APJOG6

betterhealthguy.com - Click the "Lyme" tab. (45 Doctors missed his Lyme Disease!)

/chroniclymediseasesummit.com/speakers - Let me know of any videos you want to see.
chroniclymediseasesummit2.com/schedule - Let me know of any videos you want to see.

/rawlsmd.com/lyme-support
/rawlsmd.com/health-conditions/lyme-disease
/rawlsmd.com/health-articles/best-rawlsmd-2017-our-top-10-chronic-illness-stories
/www.amzn.com/B01N7WMNIP

/www.healingwell.com/community/default.aspx?f=30&m=3884650

I'm sorry, as I know that's a lot of information. There's so much more we could share with you. I believe the more you able to align yourself with those who are on your side and focused on getting better, the more your spirits will be uplifted. In turn, you will see more hope and possibility.

Finally, I understand you feel trapped in your situation. Just recently, in my own life, I felt trapped in a job that I no longer liked, working for a company that I never liked. Despite the job aggravating my existing health issues and making things even worse, I stayed in the job, because of the salary and benefits. Eventually, I realized that I was staying in the job, so I could have the money and health insurance that allowed me to go to the doctor and discuss how the job was making me even sicker.

Well, just this past week, I quit. Now, I'm not suggesting that you quit college, your job, or anything else. In my case, I'd slowly been preparing for this eventuality and saving money. So, I positioned myself to be able to quit. But, I suffered in the process, staying longer than I would have liked.

My point is that, ultimately, we're all responsible for ourselves. Sometimes, we have to make difficult decisions that force us outside our comfort zone, in order to do what we know is ultimately in our best interest. In an ideal world, the people we love and care about the most would help us. Unfortunately, the reality is, they usually don't. There could be many reasons. But, I don't think it's a lack of concern is one of them. Most people are just doing the best they can with their current level of awareness. If they knew better, they would do better. So, in my opinion, spending time or attention on the matter is not worthwhile. It's better to focus on the things you can control and change.

Again, this is about YOU! Always put your health and well-being first. Surround yourself with people who have your best interest in mind. To the extent that you're able, minimize your contact with anyone else -- even if that includes family and friends. At least, until you recover. This is a healing and building-up period for you. Do your best to avoid anything/anyone that tears you down.

And, stay connected with us. Ask questions, vent, share your victories and progress. Personally, I want to know how things go for you. I'm cheering for you, because I know things can and will get better for you.

Sending you lots of love and good wishes,

The Dude

xfmlg
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2014
Total Posts : 166
   Posted 1/8/2018 5:58 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Afiya

I hear you as to how awfull you felt after that suicide prevention call. I ve been there a few times in rough times in my life. I have also been on the other side - namely i have been that guy on the other end of the line talking to people who call that distress line. The training that i have received changed me as a person. What was stressed in my training was the concept of active listening. In my experience with the distress line, we were all volunteers. Active listening to me means hearing the person and what they say. It means addressing their feelings, thoughts, worries, etc. It means responding to those feelings in a positive way of relating to the individual. Because through getting the person you are talking with on line to open up with those deepest of feelings, that is an often very liberating feeling for the caller. Some of the calls that i had were short and i did not sense the seriousness of the issues and others i did. I felt that it was not the number of calls we would take that mattered, but the quality of the call. If it took the whole night to be there all night in effect holding that person's hand, i would be the one to do that. You did not just need for someone to tell you what to do. You yourself deep down know what to do. What you needed was help in getting to terms with that awful feeling of doing yourself in. You feel you were / are in a hopeless situation and you know the consequences as to what happens with you when you think of the result of doing what you intend to do. That is such a scary place. I am so sorry that your support caller did not spend the time to get to those feelings. In reading your post i am sad that i was not at the distress line taking your call.

For your understanding, from my experience at the distress line, there are two types of people who are the volunteers. First there are the university students of psychology etc who want to learn about human thought processes. I think in some schools, volunteering at the distress line might even be some credits to their continuing education. These people were there for a school term or two and then they were gone. The second group of people who were there were usually older concerned empaths who truly wanted to help and who were good listeners in their private lives. Taking the course of being a volunteer distress line answerer really made me realize was that i was close to doing all of this in my life already. For 3 years i spent every weekend friday and saturday nights listening to poeple calling that distress line and i felt / knew that i was making that difference. I would be doing it now but for some reason, the distress line in our location is organized out of the big city in my vicinity and does not have any local centers that i could volunteer. I expressed disappointment that this was done this way. I think it is important to be of that community where the people call from and not from that anonymous big city. For me it is an impossibility to be at that distress line center where i would have to commute 2 hours each way into the big city to talk with someone like you who is in distress.

My talking with you like this now does not mean that i am trying to take your mind off your suicide thoughts, what i am doing is i am trying to tell you that life is for the living and even in your pain you have reached me so that i can talk with you in this manner. I truly do care that you put your thoughts onto this site to get help. If i could, i would adopt you as an honorary daughter or son as need be. I am here to listen to you and hear what you say. If you want to reach me, then just send me a message as i think i have posted my email address in this forum.

In my real life and not as part of the distress call system, i just like to help and listen to people to help them find their own paths in life. That is just me in spite of the fact that i am growing frail with this lyme crap where i now have to use a cane or 2 to help me walk even to the bathroom. I plan to walk again, but if in the meantime, i can help anyone with issues like you have, i would be honoured to talk with you. xfmlg
Male, 74. European Lyme at birth. Wife also has lyme.
1960 relapsing fever w temp to 107 3 wks intens care
1962 1965 Bells palsy twice
1981 lyme heart arythmia 3 wks intens care
2006 tick bite w bulls eye rash dismissed by reg doc
2013 09 first visit w/llnp
2014 01 lyme confirmed by igenix & llnp
CD57 @ 48
knee, elbow destroyed by bad herx 3 y ago. Elbow healed. Knee to 50%

littlevictories
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2017
Total Posts : 19
   Posted 1/8/2018 9:55 AM (GMT -6)   
hi afiya4health,

I completely understand your frustration – both with the careless attitude of the helpline responder and with the helplessness and desperation you feel from dealing with this disease. I want to encourage you to hang in there, though. It might be dim, but there is light at the end of the tunnel.

I’ve only been sick for a year and half compared to your 13 (that alone tells me that you ARE strong), but I can definitely relate to the feeling that it has made you weaker rather than stronger. I used to be very physically strong, and now I can’t do a single push up. I’ve lost a ton of hair (I’m a 32-year-old woman) and I always look terrible – dark circles, pale skin, red/glassy/hollow eyes, etc., despite eating healthy foods and taking vitamins and supplements.

I haven’t been diagnosed yet, although I know what I am dealing with, and I’m waiting on an appointment with an ID specialist which may not go very well, but that’s where I’ll start. I’ve thought many times about how I’ll feel if/when the appointment doesn’t go well, because I’ve been so desperate and have been to so many doctors with my health issues already, and a part of me thought “I’ll kill myself.” But the truth is, I won’t do that. I won’t do that because I didn’t sign on for this – Lyme doesn’t have my permission to take my life away. Instead, I’m going to take it back, even if it means I have to fight for it. I’ll take a little bit of time to regain the little bit of strength and energy I have, and I’ll figure out a way to finance care from an LLMD, or I’ll keep educating myself and start treating myself with herbal protocols only. I think the notion of fighting for our lives is so difficult, so overwhelming, because we’re already so weak and so tired, dealing with constant pain and other miserable symptoms, that the idea of fighting alone is exhausting. But, it’s worth it.

The fact of the matter is that having a disease that steals your life while you’re still living is a waking nightmare. It is a horrible thing, and it’s baffling that it’s so hard for others to understand. However, that is the reality of it, and I agree with others that the quicker you can let go of the need for others to understand, the better off you will be. You are number one. You know your experiences, and that is enough. You are your greatest champion, your best advocate.

Please know that you’re not alone. I know that doesn’t take away your problems or make you feel better physically, but I’ve found comfort in knowing that. This disease can be so isolating, especially with so few people being able to understand, however in places like this forum, you’ll find people that DO understand what you’re going through, and they WANT to help you. Being a member here has provided me with valuable information, affirmations, and validation where I otherwise received none. I was beginning to think I was crazy, that maybe it was “just stress” and that I wasn’t really sick (which is totally crazy!).

I also encourage you to keep Girlie’s helpline recommendations in mind and on hand. Your life is valuable. You’re the only you there will ever be. I personally want you to be around for a very long time, and maybe someday, through your experiences, you will be able to provide comfort and strength to another young person in need.

Please don’t give up. You are stronger than this curse.

Girlie
Forum Moderator


Date Joined May 2014
Total Posts : 32685
   Posted 1/8/2018 2:31 PM (GMT -6)   
I love this community. I knew there would be members posting such wonderful, heartfelt posts to afiya4health.



Afiya4health - please let us know how you are today. As you can see...we are concerned for you and are here to support you the best we can.
Moderator, Lyme Forum
Symp started April/2013; Buhner's Lyme May 15-July24/14; Igenex pos. July 3/14
Doxy: July 4-Aug.24/14;Zithro July26-Aug24/14; Amox + Proben. Aug. 29/14;
added biaxin Sept. 26/14
Disc. amox,added Ceftin Nov. 20th.;
Disc. biaxin added Buhner bart herbs Dec/14;Jan/15 pulsing Tinda (w/ Ceftin);
Abx/herb break Apr-July/15; July-mino; Aug. added Rif;
Nov./15 mino - to biaxi

k07
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2015
Total Posts : 2502
   Posted 1/8/2018 2:57 PM (GMT -6)   
We are here for you... Just keep praying a cure is on the horizon.

This too shall pass. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

goshawk
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2016
Total Posts : 2123
   Posted 1/8/2018 4:24 PM (GMT -6)   
Hey afiya4health,

I was checking posts when I got home from work today and I saw yours...and I just wondered who you are...what things are important to you.... when you were little what did you want to grow up to be...what used to bring a smile to your young face...

and the big question I have....if you were healed tomorrow what dreams would you follow...what would be written in the new chapters of your life

I am sorry that your path so far has been one of suffering, and it certainly is a difficult and grueling task to face this every day.

But just for a moment..lets look to tomorrow...

What if researchers find successful treatments that work

What if you could get your worst symptoms under control

What if in little steps you were able to get your life back

I believe these things are possible for you

Would you be willing to share what your worst symptoms are, and how they are being treated currently?

There are so many knowledgeable and caring members here, that may be able to offer some insight into things you could check out or research that may be of help to you.

I look forward to hearing from you and hope you post again soon, Take care, Jo

Deejavu
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 4429
   Posted 1/8/2018 6:09 PM (GMT -6)   
Dearest afiya4health,

I feel your pain and how I wish I could take your hand and pull you through my computer from NJ and sit you next to me on my couch next to my fireplace. I would tell you stories about myself when I was 21 years old.

I didn't have lyme at that age yet I was killing myself with alcohol. Yes, I am a recovering alcoholic and at 21 a drinking alcoholic. I hated myself, my life, my family, everything. My family kept putting me in rehab places and as soon as I got out I would buy a bottle of booze. Then I moved from NY to CA just to get away from my family.

One day I woke up from another hangover and I got sick of being sick and knew if I didn't stop destroying myself my wish would come true and I would die. I put myself in a hospital and a new life began for me (my last drink was in 1985). I met my first husband in a rehab and we were very happy until he got cancer and passed away.

I am telling you this because deep down inside of me there was always a "glimmer of hope" that I would stop being in pain and find some happiness in my life which I did and so can you.

I am healed from chronic lyme and you can be too. I wish I knew you better so I could give you some advice about doctors and different treatment plans.

Anyway, we don't know each other but I would be honored to know you.

Cry those tears as tears are cleansing..

And know that I care about you as many others on this forum care as well.

Sending you hugs and comfort,
Denise
12 years well ~ used Dr. Jernigan's protocol from his book about Biological Medicine (used Borrelogen, Microbojen and Neuro-Antitox).

I still detox even though healed and drink Green Vibrance. I come back to help others for others helped me when I was sick. Pay it forward! smile

http://javuviews.wordpress.com/2013/04/24/how-i-became-better-from-chronic-lyme

dacarte3
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2016
Total Posts : 1897
   Posted 1/8/2018 6:34 PM (GMT -6)   
I've felt the "will this be my life forever and if so then I can't do this" feeling with lyme before. But even in the midst of the worst of lyme and all the struggle, fear, and anxiety that it brings, what kept me going was just knowing it HAS to get better.

Even if it's not being completely healed it HAS to improve to some degree. And it does, in little baby incremental steps. Those that have shared that they have healed and me whom has healed up to 90%+ TWICE, it can for you too.

We are not some special super humans. We are just as fragile as you.

The biggest tragedy from reading your post is that you had lyme (severe enough to get you to this point) for 13 years. That's not okay. Doctors and LLMDs should have taken charge and gotten you to a much better state of health by now.

It's that part of your post that makes me the most sad/angry.

You may not want to talk about this now but what have you been doing for treatment all these years?

I see you have been a member for 5 years but have "only" posted 185 times. I mention this because if you can you should post on here more often.

Let me be the first to say that the reason why I've bounced back twice and kept my sanity during really really dark times is because of this forum. That's not hyperbole. When the main stream medical community failed me and LLMDs semi-failed me I always turned here.

The people on this forum are the best and most qualified lyme literate human beings on Earth. More than any doctor. It was only after taking treatment into my own hands through this forum and Stephen Buhner literature did I heal.

So I encourage you to be on here more often, it really does help. And when you are ready I/we will be happy to discuss full, comprehensive, holistic treatment plans.

I know lyme is a B*** and it's persistent but it shouldn't last 13 years with no significant improvement if treated properly. Something isn't right here and we are happy to help.
Lyme (Igenex) - Positive IFA and WB bands 23, 31, 41
Ehrlichia (Igenex)
Mycoplasma (Labcorp) - Score: 595

ABX Treatment: 03/2016-04/2016; 7/2017-9/2017
Buhner Protocol for Lyme and Mycoplasma: May 2016 - Dec. 2016; 8/2017 - Present

goshawk
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2016
Total Posts : 2123
   Posted 1/9/2018 3:32 AM (GMT -6)   

Purrrsiankitty
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2016
Total Posts : 1780
   Posted 1/9/2018 11:34 AM (GMT -6)   
Afiya,

So many of us relate to what you are going through, and at the same time, all our experiences are so different.

We are mistreated by doctors and often times well meaning family and friends that can't begin to relate.

We understand, come here anytime to communicate with people who have gone through or are experiencing much of what you are. HUGS.
Dx May 2015 Quest pos Elisa/neg WB. Doxy only. Restest Igenix lyme pos, neg CDC, 18 +, **23-25 IND, *30 +, **31+, **34 IND, **41+, **83-93++. Retest12/16 Igen 41+, 83-93+ whole blood-plasmid pos. Retest Lyme/co's. Neg co's. Suspected Bart. 7/15 start 16 mo of doxy, azith, ceftin. Finished 09/16. Cowden start 12/16 and stop April 2017 to deal with yeast & leaky gut.Restart Buhner for BBB.

afiya4health
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2013
Total Posts : 193
   Posted 1/9/2018 12:07 PM (GMT -6)   
Thank you everyone for your kind words. I am feeling better now. I would like to touch on a few things.
I tried Buhner and it didn't work and I personally dont like him. I even bought two of his books. Furthermore, I took a bioresonance test with my new llmd which shows that the herbs Buhner recommends doesnt do anything for me.

I was with Dr. S (NJ) for 5 years and he kept saying I was getting better and that Lyme can be completely gotten rid of, which was encouraging but in reality I wasn't getting better. Some things got better but then would jus come back later on. I left him in year 3 but then saw an even worse llmd so I went back to him because I kept seeing online that you just have to give treatment time. But honestly now that I think of it, if your treatment hasn't gotten you at least 90% by year 3 then you need to either leave that treatment or leave that doctor. I was stupid for going back to him but I kept arguing with myself on what I should do. Mind you, I'm basically alone in this. My parents will give me money for appointments and such but I'm the only one doing research on this which is hard when I'm constantly dealing with symptoms and school.

Anyways now I see Dr. Z (NJ) and she is helpful and I am slowly getting off antibiotics and will get off Rifampin by the end of this month. I've been slowly ramping up on mostly Byron white herbals but just started Crypto-plus 2 weeks ago.
I also made an appointment to go to the Sunshine Clinic in Tennessee because they seem to have a high success rate in treating lyme disease. They have a facebook group called Lyme Disease Healed which has many testimonials. My appointment is for May, after I gradate college.

It just depresses me thinking 4 years ago I never would've thought it was a possibility for me to graduate college STILL with lyme disease. This is what depresses me, remembering I had such high hopes years ago thinking by now I would've gotten better and be LiVING life but here I am still sick. And I hate this stupid diet which I've basically been on for the past 5 years, even though i cheat on it all the time.
I just think about all the things I've given up on over the years whether it was going somewhere with friends or turning down certain food and alcohol or having to quit sports team, all thinking that sometime soon I will get better. But I haven't.

Post Edited By Moderator (Girlie) : 1/9/2018 12:10:09 PM (GMT-7)


Deejavu
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 4429
   Posted 1/9/2018 4:21 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi afiya4health,

Glad you are feeling better! Also glad to hear that you are getting off the antibiotics since you've been on them for many years and not had any progress.

You are a strong person for being able to stay in college while being sick, I don't know if I could have done that. I hope you give yourself a big pat on the back!!!

Please don't be so hard on yourself as if you set your expectations too high you are setting yourself up for these emotional let downs. Be kinder to yourself. It's also great that your parents are paying for your doctors, I know many who are totally alone in this and have to fend for themselves.

I don't know anything about the Sunshine Clinic but I do know this: if you can get in the habit of detoxing every single day you will start feeling better. Toxins cause most of the pain and if those toxins don't get out of one's system where do they go? They cycle right back into one's body causing more problems.

Even though I'm healed for 12 years I still take detox baths, dry skin brush my body, etc. because I believe we live in a toxic world but that's me.

My motto has been if someone doesn't feel better after 6 months of treatment whether it's abx or herbs then it's time to try something else.

Best to you and please keep us updated okay?
Denise
12 years well ~ used Dr. Jernigan's protocol from his book about Biological Medicine (used Borrelogen, Microbojen and Neuro-Antitox).

I still detox even though healed and drink Green Vibrance. I come back to help others for others helped me when I was sick. Pay it forward! smile

http://javuviews.wordpress.com/2013/04/24/how-i-became-better-from-chronic-lyme

Wisco woman
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2017
Total Posts : 66
   Posted 1/9/2018 6:06 PM (GMT -6)   
Afiya I'm so sorry for the way you have been feeling. Five years is a long time. I've been been dealing with it for about a year and a half and there were so many times I felt like giving up. I can't imagine five years. All I can say is lean on the people closest to you and I'll say a prayer for you. Also that is incredibly stupid how you were treated on the hotline. Very sad to hear.

goshawk
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2016
Total Posts : 2123
   Posted 1/9/2018 6:11 PM (GMT -6)   
Thanks for keeping in touch with us and post whenever you have questions, need support or just want to vent.
We are here for you, Take care, Jo

dacarte3
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2016
Total Posts : 1897
   Posted 1/9/2018 6:23 PM (GMT -6)   
afiya4health said...
Thank you everyone for your kind words. I am feeling better now. I would like to touch on a few things.
I tried Buhner and it didn't work and I personally dont like him. I even bought two of his books. Furthermore, I took a bioresonance test with my new llmd which shows that the herbs Buhner recommends doesnt do anything for me.

I've been slowly ramping up on mostly Byron white herbals but just started Crypto-plus 2 weeks ago.


Interesting, those concoctions have herbs that Buhner researches and talks about. He writes more than "lyme" books, he writes about herbs in general in multiple books.

Buhner didn't "invent" any herbs. They are just herbs that exist already on Earth.
Lyme (Igenex) - Positive IFA and WB bands 23, 31, 41
Ehrlichia (Igenex)
Mycoplasma (Labcorp) - Score: 595

ABX Treatment: 03/2016-04/2016; 7/2017-9/2017
Buhner Protocol for Lyme and Mycoplasma: May 2016 - Dec. 2016; 8/2017 - Present
New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Monday, June 25, 2018 6:25 AM (GMT -6)
There are a total of 2,974,926 posts in 326,228 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 161317 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, chris fletcher.
367 Guest(s), 8 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
Noluck, Blake Letras, suppwife, Bull101, johncl, dbwilco, OriolCarol, olsky