If I had the power to laugh I would have because I was just about to post an extremely similar post. I too have been getting treated for chronic lyme since 2016. Currently I do have a lot of my energy back and some of the other physical symptoms have gotten better. Recently however I have been depressed and anxious to the point of harboring some suicidal thoughts. I dont think I would go through with these thoughts, but they are very disturbing nonetheless.
I actually just came back from a vacation to see family in Florida and while it was nice, I did not feel as well as I thought I may have, (waking up early from anxiety, depression, etc.) Now that I am back up north and alone again my depression and anxiety have been scary bad....like really scary. I had a visit with my LLMD yesterday (I am currently on 3x a day Tetracycline (Compound with Loxo) and he had said I would be on abx for several more years before I am completely better.
This has me ruminating about where I will be in three years, as the restrictions with treatment have made me a rather isolated person. (I work 4 days a week and run my own design business, but for the last 18 months life has seemingly been passing me by with little enjoyment) Even though I am able to snowboard and do some of the things I used to love, I feel like a hollow shell of myself. I have grown apart from pretty much all of my friends, and just dont know if I can put up with another 3 or more years of this without completely going off the deep end.
So, although I may not have answers for you, I do understand your fight. I have been on a lot of the same meds that you have listed (my list below is rather outdated)
Can't help but think about just giving up and seeing a traditional doctor and getting back on antidepressants, anti-anxiety meds, etc. Especially when there is no garuntee this treatment will work and that I can make it to the end.
Thanks for your post. Hope to hear some answers soon!
Been treating with abx and natural supplements since august 2016 (with LLMD). Currently pulsing Zithromax and Minocycline, also using Plaquenil, BB-2, BA-1, Cat's Claw, Stevia and Artemsia+ complex tablets. Western Blot Positive tested IGM Serum 2.6? Other Western Blots - IGM - 41 and 23. CD-57 = 34L. Being treated for babs by clinical diagnosis.