I see. I didn't know that. It's just when I see people talking about herxing or read about it they say stuff like "if it's too bad go to the hospital" so it just has me confused a bit I guess. I was more tired today but I still managed to exercise and stuff but I have been on edge all day long. Full blown depression.
Hi RedWhite&blue I have the same symptoms. I think my lyme is mainly in my head bc my symptoms have mainly been psych. I have anxiety and suicidal thoughts. I dont label it as depression bc I dont feel sad about
my life etc but the thoughts do not go away! sometimes I get clear days where I am ok then there are periods like now where literally from the moment I
open my eyes in the morning I am fighting those thoughts. I know this is not me, I know I want to live but it's like a record that just keeps playing in my head. this past weekend I barely got out of bed, I was so emotional and my body was super fatigued. I guess it is depression but it's like being trapped in your head, I know who I am and that I love my life but I have these thoughts going through my head and that I wont get better. It's like a physical sensation, my head doesnt feel right. I get head pressure, weird feelings in my head. It's so hard to explain! I was a completely normal, healthy person and then my life just went over a cliff. I am hanging on everyday. I just keep telling myself that I need to survive this! It's so hard though and very scary when you dont feel like you can control yourself.
Just know that you are not alone.
I want to do a survey of other Lyme suffers who have suicidal thoughts. I dont think it's the typical I feel my life is worthless type of SI but like mine where you are fully aware that you want to live but have these thoughts that are constantly playing in the background.
If this would go away I would be fine. Mine also flare up when I herx (or at least I assume it's a herx) but the more I think about
it, it seems like it happens in cycles on it's own.
Hang in there.
Symptoms Sept 2017. Positive Lyme IgM
Treatment Oct 2017-present