Yep, that all sounds like me too.
My whole life seems to be flashing before my eyes on a permanent basis. It's like I'm 5, I'm 27, I'm 15, I'm 40... no idea what is going on any more.
That's so far out man. I've had an exceptional memory throughout my life, I remember you posted that elsewhere, and likewise it's why I remember you mentioning running away from home in another thread. The way I function now, I'm like an old slow computer but the hard-drive still has all the data, it just spews it out randomly now and then.
It's darn disturbing! I hope you manage to get it under wraps. I'm just resigning myself to it all, I never thought my symptoms would get this bad but hey ho that's life. It's bewildering having memories of some holiday coming back or some random walk to the shops that I didn't even think I'd remembered.
I just want to encourage you, take it or leave it. Look up 1 Corinthians 10:13. I know this is all hellish, I honestly think to myself I'd be better of dead the way I feel sometimes, but hold on to God. There's an end in sight I'm sure of it.>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Yep, I think my brain is kind of gone really. Not sure how I am supposed to recover from this. Before the Lyme diagnosis dementia was being talked about
, so it's pretty bleak. I don't know how I manage to type half of these messages if I'm honest.
I used to have a memory like an elephant too. Now it's like my past memories are all I have and I can't think of anything else. My brain seems to be furiously searching through my entire life to try and remember what it feels like to be well. That's what it feels like to me. It's just gone completely haywire.
I can definitely relate to everything you say. I'd say this has well and truly gotten hold of us. I don't know whether it's inflammation in the brain, the toxins, ammonia, tissue damage, the actual bacteria or if any of this is actually reversible. I doubt that 10 years of psych meds did my brain a lot of good either. All I do know is that this is clearly very serious and I'm in big trouble here.
I shall have me a look at that bible verse. The one bizarre thing about
all this is that it has brought me closer to God. I still question His existence and I get angry with Him too, but as someone who has been an atheist most of his life, some very, very unusual things have happened since I asked for His help. I'm not entirely sure what it all means.