Posted 2/21/2009 8:35 AM (GMT -6)
My name is Jack and about 10 years ago I was in a motorcycle accident and was injured. I went from a very social, active, outgoing person to what I have become today. I guess I write this as a testimonial of what severe migraines can do to a person and as a cry for help.
Before my accident I carried a 4.0 grade point average through high school. I played football, baseball, and I was in various clubs. Things were going great when my life took a turn for the worse. I was showing off for some friends on my motorcycle when I wrecked doing about 65mph. I was wearing a helmet but I hit the back of it so hard on the pavement that it blackened both of my eyes. I suffered severe road rash and I also twisted my knee wrong. I had to have surgery on my ACL and left knee.
Since the accident not a day has passed that I haven't had some form of headache ... I always have one. I have severe migraines around the frequency of four to five times a week. At times they are so severe I clench up, the vessels in my nose burst and usually after that I go into seizures. I started missing school, quite often ... I slowly went from that social, active, outgoing person to a depressed mess with no friends because I'd chased them all away.
Today, I've devoloped a secondary condition that stemmed from the migraines called Meniere's Disease. I've hit rock bottom and feel like a leech. Everything has to be done for me. My migraines cause me to be VERY light sensitive and I get dizzy in the dark because of the Meniere's Disease. I've come to the point that I had to put in for disability and have a law office working on that for me, which may be a relief financially. It will help ease the burden on everyone else, but what about me?
I've been to 2 different neorological specialists, an optical neorologist, a chiropractor ... well, this list could get very sizable. All this, and I've had no insurance since 25. My family, and girlfriend, have paid for it all and I really don't feel like I give them anything back in return except for misery and discontent. I know they all love me very much ... there actions are a testiment to this, but at some point or another all of them have told me that I am miserable to be around. Even I know I am.
I have a box in the corner full of migraine medication; nothing has worked. I have went in and had lidocaine injected into the pressure points in my back for weeks on end with no avail. I've been on vitamin regiments, diets, exercise routines and just about everything else you can think of. Nothing works.
I go to bed at night praying that I won't wake up. I honestly don't see how life could be worse than this. I live in pain, I'm 28, I can't work, my light sensitivity has gotten so bad that we've covered all the windows with blackout curtains and I RARELY see the light of day. I make everyone around me miserable and, in all honesty, I just want it all to end.