I am so sorry to hear about your daughter, and I can empathize with your pain as a mom. I was looking for a chat room to gain support/advice for my feelings about my son, who was diagnosed two weeks before his 18th birthday. My mom passed away two weeks later from complications of MS. I shared that point only to describe to you the fog we were in at that time of our lives. My son is now 22, and I wish that I had handled things differently. I wish that I would have put him immediately into counseling (I left the decision up to him). I couldn't "force" him to take his medications, but in many ways, I wish that I had! He would stop and start -- and, of course, once he moved out, I really had no say in the matter then. His disease is progressing, and he suffers with cognitive issues. I think that your daughter would definitely benefit from counseling. The key is to find someone that they can relate to, because you can't force her to talk, but in time, she may come to open up to the counselor in ways she won't be able to with you. I'm convinced now that this might have been "key" to my son accepting things a little sooner. ???
I am having difficulty watching my son drift emotionally. Physically, he is experiencing a tingling/numb sensation in his hand and arm. He doesn't have trouble walking, talking, or with his vision. He has ulcerative colitis that seems to be under control. Upon site, he looks fit as a fiddle! But he has not completed any classes in three years, he starts/quits/or gets fired from part-time jobs. He seems to have trouble problem solving, concentrating, and is impulsive. The neurologist has put him on additional medication to help him with concentration. And my son started his Betaseron shots a week ago. He is living at home. He knows what he wants to do, but it's the steps to meet the goal that he seems to have so much trouble with. He doesn't always "connect the dots" so to speak. I honestly don't know what to do to help him. I did convince him (with some leverage about the conditions of living a home) to see a counselor. He talks about returning to school, finding a job -- I don't know what resources might be out there for him. We're looking into programs he might be interested in, and I've had discussions with him about the extra help he might need so that he can be successful in completing his schoolwork (ie. tutoring). But schooling may not be the answer for him -- I'm wondering about employment options. Both he and I KNOW that he has to do a lot of this on his own, but I want him to realize (I think he does) that he's not ALONE. I talk to him about taking advantage of the resources/assistance offered to set himself up for success. By the way, he doesn't act "depressed". He just acts like he can't seem to go from A to B to C -- he'd rather just go A to C and doesn't think about the fact that consequences are going to occur. It's tough to watch all this!! On my end, I have to figure out how to separate myself from him enough so that he can stand on his own two feet, but also be there as a support. I do better some days than others.