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Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 896
   Posted 7/1/2006 6:31 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi all,
Sorry I haven't been able to post much lately.  I have had a particularly rough 2 weeks.  I had a good friend that ended up in the hospital and I needed to stay with her much of the day 2 weeks ago and then this past week I've had appt's and had to play "catch up" with my errands etc.
All that and I am feeling worst than ever.  My legs are so very weak and heavy I've dramatically decreased my walking on the treadmill because I just can't do it.  I am having more frequent nausea and constipation & my G.I. doc told me I have a sluggish bowel from the MS and is starting me on Zelnorm.
The new kitten is growing and is so darling, he is still like having a 2 year old and even though he is delightful, he has increased my daily load!
I will see my neuro on Monday, I hope he has some words of encouragement...I definately need them! 
Uppity, John, Mike....since you have all had MS for many years, do you ever get to the point where you accept it all and just live day to day without all the new stuff cropping up and staying???
Hoping you all have a safe and happy 4th of July!
Michelle ><>
 Smile, Smile, Smile!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 2135
   Posted 7/1/2006 6:50 PM (GMT -6)   

Here is my general philosophy about MS.

I have MS.  It certainly has left me significantly impaired...but then, I've had it for 23 years, now, long before any of the meds were available, and I had multiple serious exacerbations which disabled me.

But: there are a LOT of diseases worse than MS.  ALS comes to mind. Cancer. Other life-threatening diseases. 

I can either accept that I have MS, and go about living my life. Or I can't.  If I can't -- then what are my choices? Complain about it, rail to the world, or to my "higher power", something like, "Woe is me! What did I do to deserve this??!!  Why me???? I tried to live a good life!!"  Drag down everyone around me with my depression, or my frantic search for "the cure" for an incurable (right now) disease.

Or I can accept that I have it, do the best I can to manage symptoms, take meds that show promise that they'll slow or stop exacerbations, and get on with my life.  I can learn to work around the worst of it, accept that there will be things I cannot do, so look instead for the things I CAN do, and rejoice in them. I can learn to do old things in new ways, or let go of old things that I'd like to do but simply can't anymore.  I grieve their loss...then move on. I lower my expectations about "the way life should be",

and rejoice if I wake up in the morning, happy that "life is".  Already it's a good day. And maybe it will be better...or not.  If it's better, then I accomplish some things, play with my furkids, cook a meal, or fix a special dessert for my husband.  If it's not...I find a good book and a pot of tea and get out of my husband's way so he can manage to take care of his needs without me.

I don't like having to inject every other day...but I do it. Maybe it will continue to slow the disease. At best, maybe the fact that I've been on it this long without long-term complications will help doctors understand it's long-term benefits, and that information will help someone else.  I follow research on new drugs, but am pretty sure I'm so impaired it won't make much difference for me. But maybe someone else newly diagnosed will benefit, and I'll rejoice.

While I do belong to a church - -Unitarian Universalist church -- I don't believe in a "higher power", or "life after death", or "once I get to heaven I will be healed" or any of that.  I just live each day as best I can, try to do some good for someone each day, go to bed, and if I wake up, do it again.

Works for me.



...I am not a doctor, nor health professional, and don't pretend to be one, here.....

got better things to do
Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 176
   Posted 7/1/2006 7:25 PM (GMT -6)   
 I am sure everybody understands that you have a life other than a computer. Heck I am a mother and A wife also,And that alone takes up energy and time and wares me down and then on top of all the other things you had going on yes, my dear you are warn out!
I hope that things get better for you.I would think that keeping yourself occupied as you have, is what keeps you going. Yes it will get you down, but doing good things for others as you have done, is the type of supporting person that you are.As I have heard from other msers "I have Ms, Ms does not have me" And with those words and reading all the helpful info on here is what keeps me going. Its people like all of you,that help us newly diagnosed get thru the day without lying down and giving up on life.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 1852
   Posted 7/1/2006 8:44 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Michelle,

While we certainly miss you when you can't be here, I'm sure everyone understands when you can't be. I hope that your friend is doing well and I'm sure she truly appreciates you being there for her. I'll be thinking of you Monday when you visit your doctor and I hope that they will be able to do something to make you feel better. I've heard very good things about Zelnorm.

As for your other question, Mike has a few words for you in response:


I dont ever think about how my life was before MS because my life now is what it is. Me having MS really isn't about me but how it might help people around me, lessons they can learn or get from it. If new things happen that then just defines my life from that point on. I don't miss what I once had because I've already lived that part of my life. I hope that makes sense and helps you somehow.

Allow Healing Well to continue to help others, clink link for details

Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 896
   Posted 7/1/2006 9:12 PM (GMT -6)   
Thank you so much for all the reply's!  I do intend to hang in there, I appreciate all your words of encouragement and Mike, thank you for posting!
I agree that if I'm going through all this to help someone else in the long run then it is worth it.  I think I can make it through but I just want to get to the point where everything is leveled off and I don't have new things that aren't going away.  I know I may continue to go downhill and I pray that I will have the courage to endour just like all of you have!
I have lived through breast cancer (bilateral mastectomies w/reconstruction...still going through reconstruction tune ups!), lupus diagnosis (took a long time) and various other surgeries.  But by far, this MS thing has been the hardest for me to deal with...and so debilitating! 
I guess we'll all hang in there together! :-)
Michelle ><>
 Smile, Smile, Smile!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 2146
   Posted 7/1/2006 9:44 PM (GMT -6)   
Hey Michelle

I just wanted to let u know i hear u and care very much that u'r dealing with all that u'r dealing with. I hope u have a great week and appt on monday. As much as u'r doing to help others, don't forget about u'rself and all u need to make it. Take the time u need to care for u'rself and be as well as u can be. The others are right...u'r leading the way for so many others like me and u'r experience and knowledge is indeed priceless, especially when coupled with the care and prayers u also offer us. Take care of u'rself friend.


Motown John
Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 475
   Posted 7/2/2006 12:47 PM (GMT -6)   
Sunday p.m.
Hello Michelle:
I am honored that you solicited my response to your post.
Yes and no is my answer top our question.
I have leared to live with and deal with my everyday limitations of my disease.
It is a situation that I did nothing to bring into my life, and just have to learn to live with.  Now that is made so very much easier by my incredible wife and wonderful immesiate family who are always there for me. 
Not to mention an incredible  neuro who i trust implicitly.
The fact that you can still ealk on your treadmill, puts you a bit ahead of the game...maybe it is time to think about other types of exercise?
Believe me...believe me...There are still times when I really long for my healthy days...
But...just do what you can do.  John
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