really need to talk

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New Member

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 1
   Posted Yesterday 3:21 PM (GMT -6)   
hi everyone,
this is my first time here, i was diagnosed last year with relapse remitting m s sad   i really think i didnt face up to it and i think that i've really been in denial, i just started avonex and had my 3rd injection last tuesday. i really would like some one to talk to who understands what im going through. im 22, i have 2 little boys one 2years and one 3years. i was happy and really coping well with being a mam and the whole family thing. i got married to my husband 3years ago and up until my diagnoses everything was great! my parents separated 2years ago and just a couple of months ago my sister who i was very close to emigrated. so all in all ive had a lot of things going on. i dont have any friends as all of my friends from before are still clubbing and parting while im at home with my kids so ive just lost touch with all them, they just didnt understand me anymore.
so now im in this situation with this horrible disease. i absolutly hate needles ive had a huge fear since i was a child, my husband is giving me the injections. but the reason ive come on here is because ive started to feel really down, im angry in general, im impatient, cant sleep, thinking really strange thoughts. today i was driving in my car and feeling very low and a thought came over me 2 drive into an oncomming car. i didnt. i would  NEVER actually do it. its just i dunno if this is because of the avonex or is it me. im really at an all time low and in need of some help!!  before i was happy, outgoing and generaly a very positive person. i think that i hide what im feeling very well so everyone around me thinks that im coping great and they say "ur so positive" or "u look fantastic" little do they know what im feeling inside. i have told my hubbie everything but as much as he tries he can't understand.
has anyone else suffered the same feelings? i just feel really isolated, restricted and trapped.
please help me out,

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 2146
   Posted Yesterday 4:52 PM (GMT -6)   
Hey Friend

I"m so sorry to hear of u'r diagnosis and all that u'r now going thru. It can be so hard to deal with all that life can throw at u and then add to that a cronic disease and small children and u quickly can become overwhelmed. Don't be alone friend. We are here to help u. Have u seen u'r doc lately?? Maybe this would be a great thing to bring up to him/her and see what options are avail. With ms, depression is not uncommon. Hang in there friend and talk with u'r doc soon about these feelings. There are many meds available that would be of great help in overcoming these feelings. We all can and do become overwhelmed in life. It happens. I take cymbalta and i've seen clearly it's great for helping my overall outlook on life. U've done a great thing for urself in coming here...reaching out. This is a wonderful site with fantastic people. I hope u find as much support as we all have here. Take good care and please let us all know how u'r doing. Please talk to u'r doc soon and at lest let him know what's going on. Feel free to ask questions and keep reaching out. We're all here for u.
Co-Moderator, MS Forum
*~*Sometimes the Lord calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child.*~*

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 334
   Posted Yesterday 7:27 PM (GMT -6)   

Hi and welcome mlaura,


It sounds like you have a lot of really challenging things going on right now, and I’m so glad you found this site and posted. There are a lot of great people here, and I imagine quite a few of us can relate to some of what you are going through. You are not alone.


Finding out about an illness like ms does entail dealing with feelings of loss, and this often means going through a grieving process. From what you described you have also been dealing with a lot of other stressors in your life lately, and I’m sure this is not helping. While my dx is now in question, I do struggle with feelings of overwhelm and isolation. Also, as you said, the avonex could also be contributing to how you are feeling emotionally. I really hope you let your doc know about your current state of mind. As Rhonda mentioned, there are meds that can be really effective, and a therapist who treats people with chronic illness might also be worth checking into…you do not have to suffer through this feeling you are alone or without help. We are also here to offer you advice, support, and also just to listen.


Please hang in there, keep posting, and let us know how you are doing, okay?  


Post Edited (Sunnycitrus) : 9/22/2007 6:27:59 PM (GMT-6)

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 2135
   Posted Yesterday 7:51 PM (GMT -6)   

You really need to tell your doctor about your feelings.. Avonex (and the other interferons) can cause depression in people, a chemical imbalance in the brain.  It's quite possible that is causing your feelings of depression, so you need to ask him about that.

I'm sorry you've been diagnosed with MS, especially as young as you are.  I hope you keep on the Avonex (or one of the other durgs) and I hope it will keep the MS at bay for you, as long as possible.


...I am not a doctor, nor health professional, and don't pretend to be one, here.....

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3571
   Posted Today 10:16 AM (GMT -6)   

Dear Mlaura,

Welcome to HW.  I hope you find great support and friendship here.  Being diagnosed with MS is a pretty scary thing.  I am fairly newly diagnosed and find myself still going through dealing with acceptance.  Like Sunny said, you go through a real grieving process.  It takes a long time to come to terms with this disease.  Please take everyone's advice and tell your doctor.  Depression is a really common thing with MS. You do not need to suffer needlessly. 

I have experienced that very same "gosh you look great" thing while dealing with very real symptoms and fear.  Please talk to us as much as you need.  I truly hope you find the same support I have found here.  Good luck to you and let us know how you are doing.  Many of us have e-mails listed in our profiles ( just click on a name in blue ) so feel free to e-mail if we have made that available and you feel the need for more one-on-one communication.  Please know that I really struggled with my diagnosis but I am in a better place now and I am really enjoying life again even while managing symptoms.  You will too so don't give up and know that we are here for you.

Love and prayers,

diagnosed: MS  July 2006
A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs.  It's jolted by every pebble on the road.
Henry Beecher

Paris Girl
Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 33
   Posted 9/24/2007 12:10 AM (GMT -6)   
Dear Mlaura,

Please know that I am thinking of you. There are many wonderful people who are here to support you thru this difficult time.

This is a good place to find support and information and to share.

Sending you sunny thoughts.............please keep us updated on how you are doing, and what the Dr. says.

Paris Girl

Veteran Member

Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 748
   Posted 10/16/2007 3:56 PM (GMT -6)   


I'm sorry u are going through all of this.

I imagine the stress of your sis and parents divorce didn't help.  I don't have MS but I have lyme (who  really knows which  it is) symptoms very similiar and I have a brother with MS.  Anyway anytime u need a friend u can talk to me. I DO understand about friends bailing out when the illness is chronic, it hurts but I think u are better off not clubbing unless your husband does, and I cetainly hope not.  I also relate to being sick and trying to care for young ones wow but I made sure naptime was as necessary as lunch and then I would sleep.  Please tell your dr. (if U haven't ) about  your  feelings of loss fear, sadness. I found journal writing to vent saved my life.  I also found the Bible comforting.  There was a Dr. Scott peck, now deceased who wrote a book the The Road Less Traveled, excellent.  It isn't about any illness as such but it is about life and how to deal with difficulties and for me it was superlative.  My best friend we used to ride together (horses) dumped me in a very subtle way but if u have a supportive family in this case husband I think they will get your meds right and u will be happy again.  good luck I'm new to this forum else I'd give u my e-mail. Take care things WILL get better


New Member

Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 12
   Posted 10/16/2007 6:11 PM (GMT -6)   
I found this site just a few months ago as I went through the testing process. I am now two weeks into treatment, so I'm a newbie too. The friends on this site are all so willing to listen, and offer their support. Keep coming back, it's a great group of people who know what you are going through. Although my kids are all grown I can relate to you. When I was your age I had two little ones a year apart in age, and it is tough to be a mom, newly married, and have the added stress of your extended family situations. It's very hard to be the "adult" with responsibilities when your former friends are living the single life. Hang in there. Things will get better. Be sure to share how you are feeling with your doctor, because there are things to help. Do it soon, so you can start feeling better. Feel free to contact me anytime.

mystery reader
Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 257
   Posted 10/17/2007 4:31 PM (GMT -6)   
I just wanted to say that I am also sorry you are going through this. I was dx last spring and I still have moments of sadness or anger, but overall I am doing much better now (both mentally and physically). I just want to second what everyone else has said about talking to your doctor. You also might want to consider switching meds to copaxone as it has less side effects. Hang in there! I know it is easy to say that, but a lot tougher to do.
Barb/mystery reader
Diagnosed April 2007

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