How do I shower without a bag?... hmmm... I just take my bag off and step into the shower and turn on the water :) Seriously, that's what I do. If she starts spouting off while I'm in there it all goes down the drain anyway.
I have everything cut and ready for when I step out of the shower, I step out, stick a tissue over Harriet in case she decides to make a mess once the shower is over then dry my skin, pop the Eakin Seal on then put my one piece bag on - it's all done within 3 - 4 minutes (not including the time it takes for the actual shower :)
I've never used Saran wrap (Called Glad Wrap or just plastic wrap here in Oz) when I shower and don't remove my bag. It gets wet, I towel dry it, body heat soon dries out the wafer properly after I'm dressed.
I'm one of the lucky ones who don't have to shave either, thank goodness. I had my op as a kid and I'm guessing that as I matured, hair had the good sense to learn not to grow there :)
I have had an ileostomy for 32 years now due to UC.