I also was very worried about how much pain I would be in after the surgery...no surgery recovery is fun, but you will definitely be able to handle the discomfort, and they give you pain meds whenever you request them. Just make sure that when you are allowed to, you get up and go on short walks--walking as soon as you can and often after surgery really helps to seem to speed your recovery! I was walking up and down the hospital halls all the time :)
The biggest challenge for me was not being able to sit up or easily move around in bed without pain for the first few days afterward. But, every day you will feel a little better.
I just had my ileostomy a month and a half ago, due to Crohn's--and let me tell you, I was NOT happy about it when I realized it was pretty much my only choice. I cried lots, and thought "why me?" etc. I am 27 and was also very concerned about my appearance, to be frank. But now that I have had the surgery, and am pretty much healed and back to normal, I AM actually glad I had it. I would PREFER to have the ileostomy than have Crohn's interferring with my life. I NEVER have to think about going to the bathroom anymore! I just do what I want when I want!
Also, my surgeon did a great job-- but I did have one complication...right after my surgery, I had an obstrution (my intestine was twisted, which can happen when scar tissue from the surgery is forming). So I had to go back into the hospital right after I just got home from the ileostomy.. :( Good news is they were able to fix it without a second surgery! This complication is not common to have right after surgery, so do not worry. :)
This board has be WONDERFUL for me--I learned so much, my surgeon said I was probably the best-informed patient he ever had! :)
Good luck! Let us know how you are after surgery!!