cant take this Ostomie

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buxtonman
New Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 6/25/2008 10:05 PM (GMT -7)   
 HI, i am a 31 year old male with a permenet Ostomi. i have tryed the j-pouch but that made things really bad! i have had it sence a accident at work. a 900 ibs beem feil on me and huirt my back bad. 6 mounths later do to having colites the strees of it all came to a end with my large intesten birsting. ..sorrey my spellings bad.  i have had 10 surgerys to try to get reed of it but all where werst for me, and i had so much infalmation in my stomice that they had to take my left kidnee too.
 my life is a mess. i have sever deprision that meds does not help! i am lonely and wish to find a girl friend but i have become withdrown. i take 300 mg. of morhine a day so i can get around, do to my back pain  i am feeling that life for me is wroung.
 this was hard to say i am not good at spelling and i dont now what to do. i have had it sence 2001 and i still cant look at my self so how can i find a girl to exsept what i cant.
thanks for readind,
 

summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 6/25/2008 11:30 PM (GMT -7)   
first, do not worry about your spelling!!! they deal with mine, lol.

Are you depressed about the ostomy? what about it is bothering you so much? I ask so that maybe i can help you find ways to overcome what is upsetting you. Did the beam cause you to have to have the permanent ostomy? or was that because of the UC? Is there some kind of med they can give you besides the morphine, cause pain meds can make you depressed sometimes too. I really hope that I, or someone else here, will be able to help you.

buxtonman
New Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 6/26/2008 7:51 PM (GMT -7)   
summer storm;... thank you for caring. it was the uc but with all of the streets in my life from the accident that is what ascerbated it. what is that i hate it having the  ileostomie. i cant where the same pants, ether ther falling off or there to tight. i am so lonely that it is totally affecting my mind. the pain meds help my ostimie to by slowing down the processes.
when they did the j-pouch that was a horror show. 10 fully open cuts to my stomach. sterem to pelvis.with it ultimately failing. i live with a dead left kidney for over a year and had to have stents put in every three mouths.:( finely went to lahey clinic in mass. i live in Maine. they took out the j- pouch and left kidney. phsicly i am doing ok. it mentally. writing is very difficult for me, but i need to do something......thanks again:) buxtonman`~`

summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 6/27/2008 12:46 PM (GMT -7)   
it's always hard to share things like this with someone else, we are all here to listen and help anyway we can.
Could you take some immodium to help slow down your output, then maybe wean off the pain meds? Or try the bulk up diet, that is things like bananas, french fries marshmallows.
I dont' know where your stoma is placed, but i didnt' really have any problem with it as far as clothes are concerned, i bought a size larger in some things and wear longer shirts. I don't know where you are from, but in the southern US where i am, there is a store called Kohls, and they have a brand of jeans, sonoma, that fit kind of odd i buy them for my husband, and they ride low in the front but regular height in the back. Also, JCP has a brand, St John's Bay that in the womens at least (i think the mens would be the same) that streches really well, so it will fit no matter what.
I hope that helps some.

justjenjen
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2003
Total Posts : 518
   Posted 6/27/2008 4:50 PM (GMT -7)   
It sounds like you are overwhelmed right now and need someone to talk to. Have you considered a support group? Online is wonderful but sometimes it helps to actually see someone else who has as ostomy and see how 1) you cannot see this thing through your clothes and 2) there is a lot of life to be living and an ostomy does not have to get in the way. I've had an ostomy for over 8 years and there are still days I just hate having the darn thing. I don't have problems with it except on the level of vanity. Most of the time I don't let it get me down though b/c I realize the life it has afforded me. I would not be able to do even half of what I do now if not for my bag. I hope you start to feel better about yourself and your situation. In the end, it will all work out!

summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 6/27/2008 9:57 PM (GMT -7)   
yes the vanity part can be hard, but i think that most people end up looking so much healthier after getting that disease out of them that it kind of cancels out.
I know you are self concious, but i will tell you that, less than 30 minutes ago i was sitting on the couch, in the middle of two people, pretty much sandwiched together, in a fairly quiet room and neither of them had any idea i had an ostomy. I went swimming the other day, noone saw it. When i look in the mirror I see it, but I know it's there.

peggy113
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1998
   Posted 6/29/2008 10:31 AM (GMT -7)   
Regarding people not knowing about it ---- I just found out that some of our very good friends that my husband and I have known for about 18 years now had no clue that I had my ileostomy. I just never had a reason to tell them until this weekend..... (my Chinese food story).

I know that pain meds may be necessary for your back pain, but please talk to your doctor about being depressed. We have all probably gone thru some depression as some point in our lives due to the various degrees of our illnesses, but never feel that you are alone. And post here too. Don't worry about your spelling.... that is not a prerequisite to posting!!!! We are a compassionate group here.
Peggy
      
Diagnosed with CD in 1979, many resections and meds
Perm Ileostomy July 1984 at Cleveland Clinic
Disease free since surgery 
 


summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 6/29/2008 2:01 PM (GMT -7)   
Maybe you could ask about getting some anti depressants, for a short time only, they kind of scare me, but just long enough that you feel like getting out and meeting some people, then your depression would go away naturally.
And like Peggy said please do not worry about the spelling, they put up with my tupos and horrible spelling! i can actually read yoru spelling just fine, i have a friend who texts that way, and it is sort of like a second language to me, lol.
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