(((BIG HUG))) Andorable, it will get so much better, I promise!
I was out of work for 3 months after my proctocolectomy, because at 7 weeks post-op, I ended up with an infection in the area where they removed my rectum. It hurt/stung really bad, so you should definitely have your surgeon take a look at that to make sure that isn't what's going on with you.
While you're there, ask them for a different pain reliever (like Vicodin). For me, it took the pain away and pepped me up.
I had to pack my butt wound for about
6 months before it completely healed up, which was frustrating, but once it was over, it was totally worth it! My surgeon told me that Crohn's patients heal slower than others.
Also, make sure you're taking sublingual B vitamins or getting B12 shots. It's very common for those of us with ileostomies to have poor vitamin B absorption, which is a natural mood enhancer. So is St. John's Wort.
Hang in there, take time every morning to count your blessings, and know that we're here for you!
Dx'd Crohn's in '99 at age 28. Proctocolectomy and ileostomy in '06.
Disease-free and medicine-free since surgery and very thankful to be healthy again.