Sounds like you need a gallon of Colyte Bowel Prep. It's powder you mix really well with water. Chill it in the refrigerator. Drink an 8 ounce cup every 10 or 15 minutes. This makes the stool in your colon absorb water really fast. At first it makes you bloat. But then once you start pooping you feel lots better. It will totally clean you out.
Then you need to do a Sitzmark test to check your colon transit. That week no laxative. Each 2 or 3 days you have an xray and find out where the markers are in your colon. If you really have a colon that does not work, the markers won't travel in your colon, they will just sit there. If this is the case, then you would need your colon removed and small intestine hooked to top of rectum.
Before doing this, have a defecogram, anorectal manometry, pudental nerve test, and surface EMG to make sure nothing is wrong with you rectum, anus, or pelvic muscles/nerves. If there were something wrong with this area too that could not be correctable with surgery, then you would need an ileostomy. This is a stoma made out of your small intestine. A bag collects the waste.
Sounds like anything would be better than the situation you are now in. You can print this out and take it to your doc. Ask for the things I've suggested. You are heading for trouble with 34 days and no bowel move. Good Luck, Rosemary